It ain't Christmas b*tch! Our favorite old crone Jessica St. Clair joins us for our annual holiday livestream to break down 2015's Merry Kissmas—a movie with a softly magical elevator filled with unwanted kisses. They discuss Doris Roberts' forceful smooch, the flirty cousins, Kayla's obsession with the Nutcracker doll, the eccentric German shopkeeper, Carlton's triangular facial hair, the worst Santa ever, and so much more. Is it ok to commit adultery with your elevator soulmate? Is it normal to have a favorite pair of socks? Should you grab a face while kissing? The answers to all these questions get debated loudly and passionately. Merry Kissmas and a Happy Blowyear!
It ain't Christmas b*tch! Our favorite old crone Jessica St. Clair joins us for our annual holiday livestream to break down 2015's Merry Kissmas—a movie with a softly magical elevator filled with unwanted kisses. They discuss Doris Roberts' forceful smooch, the flirty cousins, Kayla's obsession with the Nutcracker doll, the eccentric German shopkeeper, Carlton's triangular facial hair, the worst Santa ever, and so much more. Is it ok to commit adultery with your elevator soulmate? Is it normal to have a favorite pair of socks? Should you grab a face while kissing? The answers to all these questions get debated loudly and passionately. Merry Kissmas and a Happy Blowyear!
[00:00:00] Paul Scheer: Dear residents, due to rampant complaints of sexual harassment from an elderly woman, we were removing the mistletoe from the elevator, effective immediately. We saw Merry Kissmas. So you know what that means.
[00:00:17] Music: [Intro Song]
[00:00:22] Paul Scheer: Hello people of Earth and welcome to the How Did This Get Made Annual live stream. We are here to talk tonight about a film called Merry Kissmas. A film financed, uh, apparently by Kay Jewelers, uh, partly financed, I should say.
[00:00:35] And what's the plot? If you haven't seen it, well, it's about a young woman who is in love but falls out of love when mistletoe forces her to kiss a man that she realizes is her true soulmate. I think that's roughly the plot, but you know what? Let's break it all down.
[00:00:51] Jessica St. Clair: I didn't see that at all.
[00:00:53] Paul Scheer: Here we go.
[00:00:54] Jason Mantzoukas: I was, I have, I have thoughts.
[00:00:55] Jessica St. Clair: I didn't see that.
[00:00:56] Paul Scheer: Too much pressure to have you all sitting next to me for that opening.
[00:00:59] Jason Mantzoukas: Just staring at you.
[00:01:00] Paul Scheer: Yeah, you just staring at me. Uh, so I need to get there quickly. Uh, welcome Jason, June.
[00:01:05] June Diane Raphael: And by the way, may the first to say Merry Kissmas.
[00:01:08] Paul Scheer: Merry Kissmas. And a happy blow year.
[00:01:11] Jason Mantzoukas: A what?
[00:01:12] Paul Scheer: A happy blow year.
[00:01:13] Jason Mantzoukas: A happy blow blow year?
[00:01:15] June Diane Raphael: What is that?
[00:01:16] Jason Mantzoukas: Wow.
[00:01:16] Paul Scheer: A blow a Yeah. Right.
[00:01:18] Jessica St. Clair: Stop.
[00:01:19] June Diane Raphael: I'm sorry. Cut this tree Wes.
[00:01:20] Paul Scheer: Merry Kissmas and a happy blow year.
[00:01:22] June Diane Raphael: No, no.
[00:01:24] Paul Scheer: I thought that's what you, that's what it was kind of building to do.
[00:01:28] Jason Mantzoukas: I wish that this movie had anywhere near that kind of sexual charge. I, I believe none of the people in this movie have given or received a blowjob ever.
[00:01:38] Jessica St. Clair: I will argue, and we, I'm gonna have a whole.
[00:01:41] Paul Scheer: Sure.
[00:01:42] Jessica St. Clair: Speech to make about this, that the only sexual chemistry that anybody had was between the cousins.
[00:01:49] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, yes. The cousin and Joshua.
[00:01:51] Paul Scheer: Yes.
[00:01:51] Jason Mantzoukas: I think the cousin and Joshua from the animal shelter.
[00:01:54] Jessica St. Clair: The shelter?
[00:01:54] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:01:54] Jessica St. Clair: Deep side part.
[00:01:55] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes. Deep side part.
[00:01:57] Jessica St. Clair: No, no, no.
[00:01:58] Jason Mantzoukas: They were.
[00:01:59] Jessica St. Clair: No.
[00:01:59] Jason Mantzoukas: On fire.
[00:02:00] Jessica St. Clair: We never saw anything.
[00:02:01] Paul Scheer: Here's what I'm gonna say, just for, uh, fans out there. This is directed by someone who we've covered, uh, multiple times in the show. Uh, the director, uh, of the 12 pups of Christmas.
[00:02:10] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh God.
[00:02:10] Paul Scheer: And the Dog Who Saved Christmas. So we.
[00:02:12] June Diane Raphael: That makes sense.
[00:02:13] Paul Scheer: We.
[00:02:13] June Diane Raphael: Is this, well, I was about to say, is this his first film or hers or her?
[00:02:18] Paul Scheer: It is her.
[00:02:18] Jessica St. Clair: Her story.
[00:02:19] June Diane Raphael: Or hers. Her story is this her? Although I don't wanna claim this for my gender, but, but is this his or hers first Christmas movie without dogs? Is what I was about to say.
[00:02:29] Jessica St. Clair: But there is a dog in it.
[00:02:30] June Diane Raphael: Barkley.
[00:02:31] Jason Mantzoukas: I'm so sorry. June. Do you not remember.
[00:02:33] June Diane Raphael: I forgot for a second.
[00:02:35] Jessica St. Clair: Mr. Barkley.
[00:02:36] June Diane Raphael: For a second.
[00:02:37] Paul Scheer: I will say, if you don't remember, um, this director has an interesting type of films that he makes. Yes. He makes Christmas movies. He makes, uh, Christmas dog movies. And he also makes, uh, serial killer films. He made a film about BTK. John Wayne Gacy. And he also.
[00:02:51] Jason Mantzoukas: See that's what this movie needed a little bit more of. Bind, torture, kill.
[00:02:56] Jessica St. Clair: That's what we had in the Doris Roberts elevator.
[00:02:59] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:03:00] Jessica St. Clair: That's where it came out.
[00:03:02] June Diane Raphael: Jessica, there was an element, you're absolutely right.
[00:03:04] Jessica St. Clair: Yes.
[00:03:04] June Diane Raphael: Of danger.
[00:03:05] Jessica St. Clair: Yes.
[00:03:06] June Diane Raphael: Desperation and violence.
[00:03:08] Jason Mantzoukas: I agree.
[00:03:09] Paul Scheer: Sexual violence.
[00:03:09] Jessica St. Clair: In that scene. Yes.
[00:03:10] June Diane Raphael: She put her finger in and outta his ear hole.
[00:03:13] Jason Mantzoukas: I desperately wanted her to be a ghost.
[00:03:15] Jessica St. Clair: No.
[00:03:15] Jason Mantzoukas: I wanted her to be revealed to be not real because there was so.
[00:03:19] Jessica St. Clair: Nothing fun about it.
[00:03:20] June Diane Raphael: Otherworldly about her.
[00:03:21] Jason Mantzoukas: Was so much. Everybody in this movie is so weirdly passive in all regards, except Doris. Doris Roberts like a shark is moving through this world from one makeout to another.
[00:03:33] Paul Scheer: But I'll say this, every character that we meet, you think, oh, they'll have a magical part like Doris Roberts.
[00:03:38] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:03:38] Paul Scheer: She might've kicked off a magical thing with a kiss.
[00:03:41] Jessica St. Clair: That's right.
[00:03:41] Paul Scheer: This Santa Claus, the, uh, the doorman.
[00:03:44] June Diane Raphael: The the pond that she throws a coin into.
[00:03:47] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:03:47] Paul Scheer: No, no magic.
[00:03:48] Jason Mantzoukas: The Santa, yeah. The, the movie keeps wanting you to feel magic and it's giving you the, the audio cue of that. That's like a magic thing is happening, but it's always in service of no magic. And I think the only thing that's posited as magic is the elevator.
[00:04:04] Jessica St. Clair: Yes.
[00:04:04] Paul Scheer: Is it magic?
[00:04:05] Jason Mantzoukas: Glass?
[00:04:06] Jessica St. Clair: Magic?
[00:04:07] Paul Scheer: Is it magic?
[00:04:08] Jessica St. Clair: Yes.
[00:04:11] Jason Mantzoukas: I just did what he couldn't do was, which was say no. Which was say no and get away.
[00:04:17] June Diane Raphael: Now. And here's the thing, I didn't get the performance from Doris Roberts. Like I really found it fascinating that he couldn't say no. And by the way, like, I don't mean to say obviously many victims of sexual violence.
[00:04:27] Jessica St. Clair: Oh no.
[00:04:28] June Diane Raphael: Don't say no in our. Our.
[00:04:32] Jessica St. Clair: Frozen in fear.
[00:04:33] June Diane Raphael: I don't know how I went down this road, but don't blame.
[00:04:35] Paul Scheer: Doris Roberts did say she only wanted this movie released after she was dead because she could really do what she needed to get done.
[00:04:41] June Diane Raphael: I don't blame him. I do think he froze. But it was very strange because it felt like he was playing, the energy he was playing was like, I don't wanna offend an a sweet old lady. And I wanted to say my brother in Christ.
[00:04:56] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:04:57] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:04:57] June Diane Raphael: She is dangerous.
[00:04:58] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes, she is.
[00:04:59] June Diane Raphael: Don't worry about her and she can handle it.
[00:05:02] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:05:02] June Diane Raphael: Yes.
[00:05:03] Jason Mantzoukas: Am I the only one that desperately wanted her in Carlton to end up at the end?
[00:05:07] June Diane Raphael: Who's Carlton?
[00:05:07] Jason Mantzoukas: Together. The fiance.
[00:05:10] Jessica St. Clair: That's wild.
[00:05:11] Paul Scheer: I, I will say.
[00:05:12] June Diane Raphael: I wanna talk about him roughly for the next hour.
[00:05:15] Jessica St. Clair: 800 minutes.
[00:05:16] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, absolute. British Carlton? Um.
[00:05:18] June Diane Raphael: No, not British.
[00:05:19] Paul Scheer: Darling.
[00:05:20] Jason Mantzoukas: Darling, darling, please.
[00:05:21] Paul Scheer: Darling.
[00:05:22] Jessica St. Clair: He was British.
[00:05:23] June Diane Raphael: Was he British?
[00:05:23] Jason Mantzoukas: I mean, I think he's trying to play British.
[00:05:26] June Diane Raphael: I thought when he first started talking I thought it was a French accent.
[00:05:29] Jason Mantzoukas: Or is it actor or is it pretentious actor? Yeah, I, although he's not an actor.
[00:05:33] Jessica St. Clair: No, he.
[00:05:33] Paul Scheer: What is he?
[00:05:34] Jason Mantzoukas: He's a producer, director of a, a film of a Nutcracker ballet in Palo Alto, California.
[00:05:42] Paul Scheer: Yes.
[00:05:42] Jason Mantzoukas: And is being treated as if he's Sondheim.
[00:05:44] June Diane Raphael: A star.
[00:05:45] Paul Scheer: But it also seemed like. It did seem like he also was famous for other things. Like, it's like almost like if Steven Spielberg decided to direct.
[00:05:53] Jason Mantzoukas: Well, he has the fame of an actor.
[00:05:55] Paul Scheer: Yes.
[00:05:55] Jason Mantzoukas: He has the fame of like a pin up. Like they have headshot's of him.
[00:05:59] Jessica St. Clair: That's, I think the reason we're thinking that is that they used the actual actor's headshot.
[00:06:05] Paul Scheer: Yeah. Yes, they did.
[00:06:06] Jessica St. Clair: And what I saw was a man, his, obviously it was like an early two thousands, you know, headshot where he did not have that insane facial hair that I wanted discuss.
[00:06:16] Paul Scheer: Was that an actor's choice? I think that that was an actor's choice for the role.
[00:06:19] June Diane Raphael: I don't know.
[00:06:19] Jessica St. Clair: Guys, have you ever seen that?
[00:06:21] June Diane Raphael: I never.
[00:06:21] Jessica St. Clair: It was a triangle shapes.
[00:06:23] June Diane Raphael: Face.
[00:06:24] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:06:24] June Diane Raphael: It was shapes. Rudimentary shapes.
[00:06:26] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:06:27] June Diane Raphael: A line, a square.
[00:06:28] Jason Mantzoukas: Is it a van diagram?
[00:06:29] Paul Scheer: No. I think has more of a spike too.
[00:06:30] Jason Mantzoukas: You might be right. You might be right. I don't. But it was, it looks almost like a Tony Stark kind of beard.
[00:06:36] Paul Scheer: I think he was trying to go for.
[00:06:37] June Diane Raphael: So what is that artist Mondrian? The, with the, the blocks?
[00:06:40] Jessica St. Clair: Yes. Yeah. Post impressionist sort of.
[00:06:43] June Diane Raphael: Yes. That's what it looked like.
[00:06:45] Jason Mantzoukas: I'm sure the chat is going wild. We guys, we talk about Mondrian too much on the podcast.
[00:06:49] Paul Scheer: Well, it's our go to.
[00:06:50] Jessica St. Clair: Every time we talk about Mondrian and everyone takes a drink.
[00:06:52] Jason Mantzoukas: Everybody's too wasted because we're talking about Mondrian so much.
[00:06:56] June Diane Raphael: I'm, I'm sorry.
[00:06:56] Paul Scheer: I do wanna know, like, it seems like the show is getting very close to happening.
[00:07:02] Jason Mantzoukas: It it's mere days away.
[00:07:04] June Diane Raphael: Can I just say something? Okay. I know they had his headshot and that confused some of us.
[00:07:08] Paul Scheer: I believe we have a picture of that headshot.
[00:07:10] June Diane Raphael: They also though, put his face on the marquee.
[00:07:14] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:07:14] Jessica St. Clair: Was that his face?
[00:07:15] Paul Scheer: Oh yes.
[00:07:16] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:07:16] June Diane Raphael: Him.
[00:07:16] Jessica St. Clair: That was great.
[00:07:17] Jason Mantzoukas: Like he's like, Hey, it's me. I thought he was going to be the star of like a movie as if he was going to be doing the Christmas Carol and he was gonna be Scrooge.
[00:07:25] Paul Scheer: Well look at something two, or, sorry, image two is we have the, the image of him.
[00:07:29] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:07:29] Jessica St. Clair: Well that's okay. This is him with long hair. I didn't know that was him.
[00:07:33] Paul Scheer: Right. It's tricky.
[00:07:34] June Diane Raphael: So many different versions of him.
[00:07:35] Jason Mantzoukas: Looks like from this distance too, he looks like Milo Ventil. He looks like Jess from Gilmore Girls.
[00:07:40] Jessica St. Clair: Thank you. He, they didn't have enough money to do a separate photo shoot of.
[00:07:44] Jason Mantzoukas: Not at all.
[00:07:45] Jessica St. Clair: Jessica, what is his
[00:07:47] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:07:47] June Diane Raphael: Job? That he should be like if he is a Steven Spielberg or even if he's a Sondheim, he would never be on the marquee, so.
[00:07:56] Jessica St. Clair: No.
[00:07:56] June Diane Raphael: That to me.
[00:07:57] Paul Scheer: Right. Don't see like how. Don't even see Spielberg presents.
[00:07:59] Jason Mantzoukas: Not only would he not be on the marquee, it wouldn't be just a random, candid photo that he's been photoshopped out of and put on the marquee.
[00:08:06] June Diane Raphael: What you didn't say earlier when you're describing all of his roles, was choreographer.
[00:08:10] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:08:10] Paul Scheer: Well, but is he a choreographer?
[00:08:12] Jason Mantzoukas: It's she. Someone says that a lot.
[00:08:15] June Diane Raphael: Well, The Nutcracker is already choreographed.
[00:08:17] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:08:17] June Diane Raphael: I don't mean to don't know that much about about it.
[00:08:20] Paul Scheer: A dance, a dance person there.
[00:08:20] June Diane Raphael: You need a dance person there. But he's not, correct me if I'm wrong, chat. Isn't the Nut aren't those dances already? Like don't you learn the Nutcracker?
[00:08:29] Jessica St. Clair: I think there's probably interpretations on a theme. I don't think that's what that was though.
[00:08:33] Paul Scheer: Wait, you're saying that a choreographer is only employed to come up with new dance moves?
[00:08:38] June Diane Raphael: I thought that's what a choreographer.
[00:08:39] Jason Mantzoukas: I, here's what I'm in agreement with June, in the sense that I think this guy is pulling a scam. I don't think he is. He is acting as if he is producing the Radio City Music Hall. Christmas show.
[00:08:53] Paul Scheer: But this is the, this is the thing. Why you could set it anywhere. Why put it in Palo Alto?
[00:08:59] Jessica St. Clair: The least christmasy place. Somebody lived there, somebody had a deal with the mayor. Somebody had to tax something.
[00:09:05] Paul Scheer: Yes.
[00:09:06] Jessica St. Clair: Because I.
[00:09:06] Jason Mantzoukas: It, it makes no sense.
[00:09:07] Jessica St. Clair: Okay.
[00:09:08] Paul Scheer: But it wasn't even shot in Palo Alto.
[00:09:09] June Diane Raphael: It wasn't? Where was it shot?
[00:09:10] Paul Scheer: No, river. Riverside.
[00:09:11] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, Riverside. Oh. It felt to me like Canada.
[00:09:13] Paul Scheer: Yeah. No, Riverside, California.
[00:09:15] Jessica St. Clair: So I think you can't have a Christmas movie without fake snow.
[00:09:20] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[00:09:20] Jessica St. Clair: And that's where Hallmark does it right. They shoot on the same lot. They have the snow going, they've got the bandstand. Like I can't do it in that kind of climate.
[00:09:30] June Diane Raphael: We live in that climate.
[00:09:32] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah. And it ain't Christmas bitch.
[00:09:33] Jason Mantzoukas: It doesn't Yeah, I agree. It doesn't. Wow.
[00:09:35] Paul Scheer: By the way, can you say one more, it ain't and.
[00:09:38] Jessica St. Clair: It aint Christmas, bitch.
[00:09:39] Paul Scheer: That's the shirt.
[00:09:40] Jessica St. Clair: You can put up as much garland as you want.
[00:09:41] June Diane Raphael: I, I mean, my children.
[00:09:42] Paul Scheer: They didn't.
[00:09:43] June Diane Raphael: Children live here and I try give give as much of a Christmas experience.
[00:09:46] Jessica St. Clair: You're doing your best. You're doing your best, but it's not good enough.
[00:09:49] June Diane Raphael: Well, I'll say my favorite Christmas movie is Mixed Nuts. That takes place in Los Angeles. In Venice.
[00:09:53] Paul Scheer: Yeah, in Santa Monica.
[00:09:55] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:09:55] June Diane Raphael: Venice. In Venice.
[00:09:56] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes. Like the, uh, the roller. The roller blade Christmas tree.
[00:10:00] June Diane Raphael: Like walking with Yeah. Rollerblading the tree.
[00:10:02] Paul Scheer: But that's like commenting on the un Christmas.
[00:10:04] June Diane Raphael: All I'm saying is I do think there is a way to do it, and I wish you wouldn't dismiss our state and our climate and say like, we can't have Christmas or we can't portray Christmas.
[00:10:13] Jessica St. Clair: We can't.
[00:10:14] June Diane Raphael: I don't think this movie can, and I agree with you there.
[00:10:16] Jessica St. Clair: The best we can.
[00:10:17] June Diane Raphael: We do, but give us another chance.
[00:10:18] Jason Mantzoukas: The movie wants it both ways because they also keep putting people in winter coats.
[00:10:23] June Diane Raphael: Yeah.
[00:10:24] Jason Mantzoukas: And stuff that's supposed to be hats. And that supposed to be winter sweaters.
[00:10:28] Jessica St. Clair: Poor carolers.
[00:10:29] Jason Mantzoukas: No thank you.
[00:10:29] Jessica St. Clair: Who were not good singers.
[00:10:31] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, lack carolers.
[00:10:32] Jessica St. Clair: They were, but they probably, because they were about to pass, there was, they were.
[00:10:37] Paul Scheer: Video clip two.
[00:10:37] Jessica St. Clair: They were just working the craft scene.
[00:10:39] Paul Scheer: Well, they, by the way, they were not working it. They were dubbed. And so tech.
[00:10:43] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh yeah.
[00:10:43] June Diane Raphael: They were definitely dubbed.
[00:10:44] Jason Mantzoukas: Watch, there's so much ADR, so many ADR lines in this movie, but it's clear they only had a male voice and a female voice for all the ADR lines.
[00:10:52] June Diane Raphael: Yes.
[00:10:52] Jason Mantzoukas: So even when it's our leads.
[00:10:54] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[00:10:54] Jason Mantzoukas: And it's an ADR line. Not them. It's not that.
[00:10:56] June Diane Raphael: I saw that too, Jason.
[00:10:57] Jason Mantzoukas: It's not them.
[00:10:57] Paul Scheer: Just take a look at how off they are on the syncing here. Just look at their lips.
[00:11:04] Jason Mantzoukas: Where's the bell? Nobody's ringing the bell. Nobody's holding the bell.
[00:11:08] Movie Audio: Happy New Year.
[00:11:12] Jason Mantzoukas: Where is the bell? And those, those characters recur throughout the movie.
[00:11:17] June Diane Raphael: Yes.
[00:11:17] Paul Scheer: Another non-magical recurrence.
[00:11:19] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes. You think the movie would have magic in it in some way, shape, or form.
[00:11:23] June Diane Raphael: The one, the one possible piece of magic we didn't discuss was the actual nutcracker.
[00:11:29] Jessica St. Clair: Okay. Well I think I have trauma from the other movies we've watched because every time that, when that Nutcracker, I thought she's gonna fuck that Nutcracker.
[00:11:39] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:11:39] Jessica St. Clair: We've learned anything from Chris's movies that bitches wanna fuck Nutcrackers.
[00:11:43] Jason Mantzoukas: Very coarse. Oh yeah.
[00:11:45] Jessica St. Clair: They do.
[00:11:45] Jason Mantzoukas: No, but I saw it too.
[00:11:46] Jessica St. Clair: They do be fucking Nutcrackers when they can.
[00:11:48] Paul Scheer: Well, we need to come together and Jess St. Clair like you like, like you need to have your own Christmas special. Bitches be fucking Nutcrackers.
[00:11:56] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah, well you can see, 'cause there is, there's a lot of ADR, there's a, they're dropping in like the bell ringing in that. But like when she saw the Nutcracker in the window for the first time.
[00:12:05] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[00:12:05] Jason Mantzoukas: There is an audible splash sound effect.
[00:12:08] Jessica St. Clair: What?
[00:12:08] Jason Mantzoukas: That is just her getting drenched.
[00:12:11] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:12:11] Jason Mantzoukas: Drenched, drenched for the cracker.
[00:12:13] Jessica St. Clair: And then even when the cookie, because didn't we see one where cookies came to life too? Somebody fucked the cookie.
[00:12:17] Paul Scheer: Yeah. Well, Nutcracker a nutcracker came to life.
[00:12:19] June Diane Raphael: Yes.
[00:12:19] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah. But I thought when the cookies were there, I'm like, these are gonna come to life.
[00:12:22] June Diane Raphael: Oh my gosh.
[00:12:23] Jessica St. Clair: I just kept waiting for, to come to life.
[00:12:25] Jason Mantzoukas: Honestly, I feel like I, I enjoyed the movie less because I kept wanting.
[00:12:29] Jessica St. Clair: Me too.
[00:12:30] Jason Mantzoukas: Something to come to life and fuck someone.
[00:12:31] June Diane Raphael: It's interesting 'cause when I, when Paul and I were watching.
[00:12:34] Jason Mantzoukas: Including all the actors.
[00:12:35] June Diane Raphael: Yeah, true. I, I actually, and I know you felt differently.
[00:12:39] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh God.
[00:12:40] June Diane Raphael: You better not change your opinion.
[00:12:42] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh gosh.
[00:12:42] June Diane Raphael: Better not change your opinion now for, for these two and for that. All of 'em out there. I know you and I both enjoyed the main leads.
[00:12:50] Paul Scheer: Oh, absolutely. Love, loved them.
[00:12:52] June Diane Raphael: Wanted them together. We wanted them together.
[00:12:54] Paul Scheer: Love was under the bridge.
[00:12:56] June Diane Raphael: Loved them. We liked their chemistry.
[00:12:57] Jason Mantzoukas: Wait, the two?
[00:12:58] Jessica St. Clair: The main leads?
[00:12:59] June Diane Raphael: The main leads. Our main leads.
[00:13:01] Jason Mantzoukas: The two people that are in an emotional affair.
[00:13:04] Paul Scheer: Well, yeah, I guess.
[00:13:06] Jason Mantzoukas: She is engaged.
[00:13:07] Paul Scheer: Yeah, but it's loose.
[00:13:08] Jason Mantzoukas: It's it's loose? She's engaged to be married, leaves a planning meeting for her engagement party, runs, chases a man into an elevator and begins to make out.
[00:13:19] June Diane Raphael: That that's just.
[00:13:20] Paul Scheer: Can you do that ladies? Can you do that?
[00:13:22] Jason Mantzoukas: Can't that do that.
[00:13:23] June Diane Raphael: Well, if you.
[00:13:23] Jason Mantzoukas: Isn't cool.
[00:13:24] June Diane Raphael: If you saw Martha Stewart's documentary, which I highly recommend, she talks about a similar moment where she was in the.
[00:13:30] Jessica St. Clair: Married.
[00:13:31] June Diane Raphael: Yes, she was married, and then she went to Florence, fell in love with the food, the sites, the art.
[00:13:35] Jessica St. Clair: That was their honeymoon.
[00:13:36] June Diane Raphael: You're right. It was her honeymoon.
[00:13:37] Paul Scheer: Whoa.
[00:13:37] June Diane Raphael: She goes on a separate trip to see the.
[00:13:39] Jason Mantzoukas: What, a heartbreak kid scenario?
[00:13:40] June Diane Raphael: She's up there and she's, she leaves the tour or whatever and there's this beautiful Italian man and she makes out with him in the duomo.
[00:13:48] Jessica St. Clair: And she does not consider it cheating.
[00:13:50] June Diane Raphael: And she doesn't. She didn't then and I don't think she does now.
[00:13:53] Jessica St. Clair: She certainly doesn't.
[00:13:53] June Diane Raphael: And I do think that's the moment we saw with Kayla.
[00:13:57] Paul Scheer: Wait a second. I need get back on this case.
[00:13:59] June Diane Raphael: Jewelers, Kayla and Casey. Derek Casey. Dustin Case,
[00:14:04] Jason Mantzoukas: Dustin.
[00:14:05] June Diane Raphael: I think she got so caught up in the moment.
[00:14:08] Jessica St. Clair: I know she was using him.
[00:14:10] Paul Scheer: Get away from.
[00:14:11] Jessica St. Clair: Who cares?
[00:14:12] Jason Mantzoukas: She's running away from the woman.
[00:14:13] Jessica St. Clair: She's such a fucking asshole.
[00:14:15] Jason Mantzoukas: I agree.
[00:14:15] Jessica St. Clair: She should be making out with Santa.
[00:14:17] Paul Scheer: First. I wanna disagree. If she was good enough at her job getting him his headache medication.
[00:14:22] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh my God.
[00:14:23] Paul Scheer: Picking up his socks and doing his cleaning. Maybe she would find some love, but she's just shirking off her responsibilities.
[00:14:29] Jason Mantzoukas: I did not, I did not like it. I did not like that she was. I couldn't figure out why she was running away from the woman who runs the tchotchke store.
[00:14:37] Jessica St. Clair: She's the, she's the show owner.
[00:14:39] June Diane Raphael: The store is Mrs. Tiddlywinkle's. Her name out is Mrs. Joiner.
[00:14:43] Jason Mantzoukas: Now, June, you seem to be very proud of yourself that you know all the character names.
[00:14:47] Jessica St. Clair: She's experiencing cognitive decline.
[00:14:48] Jason Mantzoukas: Is this a new thing?
[00:14:48] Jessica St. Clair: This is like, she's so proud.
[00:14:51] Jason Mantzoukas: Are you doing, are you taking the news?
[00:14:53] June Diane Raphael: Remember things. This time I remembered them. Jana. Jana.
[00:14:58] Paul Scheer: Wow.
[00:14:58] June Diane Raphael: Let's talk about Jana.
[00:14:59] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh yeah. We'll talk.
[00:15:00] Paul Scheer: Okay.
[00:15:01] Jason Mantzoukas: We'll talk about the, the.
[00:15:02] Paul Scheer: Jana by the way, is the one who did say, Aren't they engaged? And she's like, uh, nah. And that's not serious.
[00:15:07] June Diane Raphael: And it's not 'cause you can't take it seriously. She's in an abusive relationship.
[00:15:10] Jason Mantzoukas: She, she should get out of it before she starts making out with dudes in elevators.
[00:15:15] June Diane Raphael: So puritanical.
[00:15:16] Jessica St. Clair: In this movie. In this movie, the reality of this movie is that the way people get away from people.
[00:15:23] Paul Scheer: Mm-hmm.
[00:15:23] Jessica St. Clair: Is to just make out with a stranger.
[00:15:25] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:15:25] Jessica St. Clair: And nobody is surprised by it. Even him really.
[00:15:28] Paul Scheer: Well, because that's a sign, you have a book.
[00:15:30] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:15:30] Paul Scheer: The Art of Small Talk.
[00:15:31] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:15:31] Paul Scheer: What chapter do you have when you have to just grab somebody and kiss them, right? Yeah. That is like, it's a small talk move. Right?
[00:15:36] Jessica St. Clair: Listen, I wish that was a rule in our modern day society. I do.
[00:15:40] Jason Mantzoukas: He is un, he has no time to prepare for this kiss. She's not following him. He doesn't know he's being chased.
[00:15:46] June Diane Raphael: How much time does he need? How much time?
[00:15:47] Jason Mantzoukas: To be to, to be assaulted, assaulted in my building?
[00:15:50] June Diane Raphael: Well, okay, if you're talking, are you talking about Doris Roberts or Kayla?
[00:15:53] Jessica St. Clair: No, I'm talking about Kayla.
[00:15:54] Jason Mantzoukas: Both.
[00:15:54] Jessica St. Clair: Kayla comes in hot.
[00:15:55] June Diane Raphael: Kayla is adorable. I love the actress.
[00:15:58] Paul Scheer: I know the thing. I'm not disagreeing with you.
[00:16:00] June Diane Raphael: I don't want you to, I don't want you to kowtow to all you know all of them. You loved her.
[00:16:04] Jason Mantzoukas: So you're saying Paul.
[00:16:04] June Diane Raphael: We both loved her.
[00:16:05] Jason Mantzoukas: Paul's up for grabs in elevators. As long as she's beautiful and not Doris Roberts. As long as, as long as she's cute and beautiful.
[00:16:12] June Diane Raphael: I would be very upset. Of course, I would be upset.
[00:16:14] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:16:15] June Diane Raphael: But if Paul were in a miserable relationship where he was in some sort of like, she's being kept emotionally hostage.
[00:16:22] Paul Scheer: Let's watch this scene. Look at this.
[00:16:24] Jason Mantzoukas: He doesn't know she's there.
[00:16:25] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[00:16:25] Jason Mantzoukas: When have you ever seen a glass door on an elevator?
[00:16:27] Paul Scheer: Oh, that, that has an issue.
[00:16:29] Jason Mantzoukas: When, have you ever seen a glass door?
[00:16:31] Paul Scheer: No glass doors.
[00:16:33] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, oh, oh, you wanna get in?
[00:16:34] June Diane Raphael: Right now, you should start getting prepared. And now it's happening.
[00:16:38] Jessica St. Clair: This woman.
[00:16:39] Paul Scheer: Now, she just saw an affair.
[00:16:41] Jason Mantzoukas: Now everybody in small town knows she's from here. Kayla, everybody knows she's engaged to the superstar. Look at them. They're gonna about to go in for more.
[00:16:50] June Diane Raphael: I know. I loved it.
[00:16:52] Paul Scheer: I thought it was.
[00:16:53] Jason Mantzoukas: No, she's wearing a gigantic diamond ring. How does he not notice the ring?
[00:16:57] Movie Audio: Away from Mrs. Joiner.
[00:16:59] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh yeah.
[00:17:00] Paul Scheer: He knows it as a thing.
[00:17:01] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, you, you're trying to get away too?
[00:17:03] Jessica St. Clair: See, that's my point. He thinks it's no bigs. Like I get it.
[00:17:06] Jason Mantzoukas: He thinks he's meeting the love of his life.
[00:17:08] June Diane Raphael: Guys, we are under a missile toe. I feel like we're forgetting.
[00:17:11] Paul Scheer: Where is it?
[00:17:12] June Diane Raphael: It's above.
[00:17:12] Jason Mantzoukas: It's on the, it's in the it's, it is up there. But you look this okay. There is.
[00:17:16] June Diane Raphael: One life to live. Why not?
[00:17:17] Jason Mantzoukas: Wait a minute.
[00:17:18] Paul Scheer: Wow.
[00:17:19] Jason Mantzoukas: Why not? One life to, why not?
[00:17:20] June Diane Raphael: We are our hearts beat. We have one go round. This is not a dress rehearsal.
[00:17:25] Jessica St. Clair: Wow.
[00:17:25] Jason Mantzoukas: She should immediately say, I'm sorry, I'm engaged. And call her guy and say, you're dumped. And now they can be in love.
[00:17:32] Movie Audio: Casey.
[00:17:33] Kayla.
[00:17:33] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, they have not met. Oh, so cool.
[00:17:35] Movie Audio: Guess a handshake.
[00:17:36] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, why not see that ring guy?
[00:17:38] Paul Scheer: I do think that if you're making a movie about mistletoe in an elevator, it should be more prominently displayed like, oh, well it's okay because of this.
[00:17:45] Jason Mantzoukas: Tell us that the mistletoe affects.
[00:17:47] Jessica St. Clair: Magic.
[00:17:47] Jason Mantzoukas: Everybody through magic and they cannot not kiss.
[00:17:51] Jessica St. Clair: Okay. Can we just back up for a second?
[00:17:53] June Diane Raphael: They're just following. They're just following Christmas rules. Christmas rules state if you have mistlestoe over you, you have to, has to kiss.
[00:18:01] Jason Mantzoukas: But trump's an engagement?
[00:18:03] June Diane Raphael: It does.
[00:18:03] Paul Scheer: No, no, no.
[00:18:03] June Diane Raphael: I wouldn't wanna be under mistletoe. If I am.
[00:18:06] Paul Scheer: She's running to escape. Making a mistletoe choice.
[00:18:09] Jason Mantzoukas: No, she has no idea.
[00:18:10] Paul Scheer: Yes.
[00:18:10] June Diane Raphael: She has no idea. He knows he's under mistletoe and then it's a great kiss. Why not go back for a little more? 'cause now we are under mistletoe?
[00:18:18] Paul Scheer: Well, he should have said, well, you know, we are.
[00:18:20] Jason Mantzoukas: If I'm him and I find out this woman, this incredible woman that I had this incredible kiss with is engaged and was using me for like extracurricular elevator kisses, just so she can get off. I'm like, hard pass.
[00:18:35] Jessica St. Clair: Really?
[00:18:35] June Diane Raphael: Wow.
[00:18:36] Jason Mantzoukas: Hard pass.
[00:18:37] Jessica St. Clair: Lemme ask you.
[00:18:37] Jason Mantzoukas: I don't wanna, I don't wanna be molested by an engaged woman.
[00:18:40] Jessica St. Clair: Would you have stamped this woman if this was, you have, if somebody came?
[00:18:44] Jason Mantzoukas: Would I have stabbed? So that is the only, you don't saying, the only way to say no, you don't, the only way to effectively say no is to stab her.
[00:18:52] Paul Scheer: Well, you do carry weapons.
[00:18:53] Jason Mantzoukas: You've gotten outta control.
[00:18:54] Jessica St. Clair: You don't even let me touch you at all. Ever.
[00:18:57] Jason Mantzoukas: I thank God.
[00:18:57] Jessica St. Clair: Okay. Ever.
[00:18:58] Jason Mantzoukas: And I've never stabbed you. And I've never stabbed you.
[00:19:01] Jessica St. Clair: But my point is, what would you do? Honestly, if you're standing in ver someone rushed in and just started kissing you, what?
[00:19:07] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, first of all, they would, would never get, they would, I would if anybody started to come super.
[00:19:11] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[00:19:11] Jason Mantzoukas: Even if someone came close to me.
[00:19:12] Jessica St. Clair: You would stab them.
[00:19:12] Jason Mantzoukas: You would would.
[00:19:13] Paul Scheer: By the way, this is even close. This is even very close for you.
[00:19:16] Jason Mantzoukas: This is too close for me.
[00:19:17] Paul Scheer: Yeah. That's what I'm saying. Like.
[00:19:18] Jason Mantzoukas: I, I would rather not be in this room.
[00:19:20] Jessica St. Clair: Okay.
[00:19:20] Jason Mantzoukas: With all of you. Um, but no, if someone were to come rushing and start trying to kiss me.
[00:19:26] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[00:19:26] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:19:26] Jason Mantzoukas: I would be like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What? What's going on here?
[00:19:29] Paul Scheer: Right. Right. You would have some sort of reaction to it.
[00:19:31] Jason Mantzoukas: For sure. And it would be, yeah. Initially. Quite negative.
[00:19:34] Jessica St. Clair: What if they were super hot though? Because.
[00:19:36] June Diane Raphael: That's what I'm saying.
[00:19:37] Paul Scheer: Talia Shire.
[00:19:38] June Diane Raphael: That's what I'm saying.
[00:19:38] Paul Scheer: Perhaps.
[00:19:39] Jason Mantzoukas: Talia Shire currently? Talia Shire.
[00:19:41] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[00:19:41] Jason Mantzoukas: Okay.
[00:19:42] Paul Scheer: I think, let's go back to the first one. If it's like a Doris Roberts
[00:19:45] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, oh, oh.
[00:19:46] Paul Scheer: You know, wait. Yeah. If you. I wanted to give you.
[00:19:49] Jason Mantzoukas: I've got questions about being inside the Coppola family, about the Rocky movies, the Godfather movies. I would, I would probably take Talia Shire kiss.
[00:19:57] Paul Scheer: That's a thing like, I think an old person.
[00:19:59] Jason Mantzoukas: Just to get to the information I'm looking for. If, if I'm being honest, you know.
[00:20:02] June Diane Raphael: All i'm saying is life is for the living.
[00:20:04] Jason Mantzoukas: Okay. Interesting.
[00:20:05] June Diane Raphael: Okay.
[00:20:06] Jason Mantzoukas: Now interesting.
[00:20:07] June Diane Raphael: It's like we can't, you know, these things, things happen. We're, I know there's all of these like rules you subscribe to and that's great and, but, but you can't deny life and chemistry. And sometimes shit happens and you have to.
[00:20:21] Paul Scheer: But she didn't even know.
[00:20:22] June Diane Raphael: Doesn't make someone a bad person.
[00:20:24] Paul Scheer: So by your logic, we should just be randomly kissing people in the street because there is no like connection with them.
[00:20:29] June Diane Raphael: If they're your soulmate, which is exactly what happened here, yeah.
[00:20:32] Jason Mantzoukas: But what you are saying.
[00:20:33] June Diane Raphael: Yeah.
[00:20:34] Jason Mantzoukas: Is cheating is okay if the person is.
[00:20:37] June Diane Raphael: With your soulmates.
[00:20:38] Jason Mantzoukas: If the a grieved party is a bad person. The, the Carlton in this case.
[00:20:42] June Diane Raphael: Yeah, I, I'm sorry. I do think so.
[00:20:43] Jason Mantzoukas: If we liked Carlton, if he was a good match for her, but maybe not forever.
[00:20:48] June Diane Raphael: I would never support that kiss.
[00:20:49] Jason Mantzoukas: Then the kiss in the elevator becomes bad, but
[00:20:50] June Diane Raphael: Correct.
[00:20:51] Jason Mantzoukas: Because Carlton is bad. So in this case, she can never be bad unless he is.
[00:20:56] Paul Scheer: Well, but by the way, you don't know this about June, but June is the person who told Schwarzenegger that famous story, eating's not cheating.
[00:21:03] Jason Mantzoukas: Okay.
[00:21:03] Paul Scheer: Yeah. So that's that. So that's where she's coming at it from.
[00:21:07] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes, totally.
[00:21:08] Paul Scheer: That's that cheating. Yeah.
[00:21:09] Jason Mantzoukas: It does sound like a St. Clair line.
[00:21:10] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah. This is disgusting.
[00:21:16] June Diane Raphael: Can we talk about that? I wanna go back whether you think she's a bad person or not. Like I listen things again, I'll just say that.
[00:21:23] Jessica St. Clair: Life this for the living. We get it.
[00:21:25] June Diane Raphael: Have one go around. Okay. So I, I do wanna talk about Mrs. Joiner though, because
[00:21:30] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, big time.
[00:21:31] June Diane Raphael: Her business.
[00:21:32] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes, I do have, I do have thoughts on what that is.
[00:21:34] June Diane Raphael: Yeah. Because here's what we know about her. Fir the first interaction with Kay, where she comes on way too strong, wants drugs from her, but then we learn that when he comes by, when Dustin comes by to get that Nutcracker, she won't stay open for him.
[00:21:51] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, yes.
[00:21:52] June Diane Raphael: She won't stay open another couple minutes, which makes me wonder.
[00:21:55] Jason Mantzoukas: To make a sale.
[00:21:55] June Diane Raphael: How much business is Mrs. Tiddlywinks getting?
[00:22:00] Jason Mantzoukas: Her store appears to be one of those like indoor flea market stores, right? Where it's a series of little cubby holes where different people are selling stuff.
[00:22:08] Paul Scheer: And there's one of those, uh, Sigmund Freud action figures I saw on her shelf.
[00:22:11] June Diane Raphael: Yes. And then when she, before she realizes that Kay has left, she's staring down at the Nutcracker and says something along the lines of like, yeah, uh, I should get more of those. Or clocks.
[00:22:25] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:22:25] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:22:25] June Diane Raphael: With little figurines around them. It is absolutely.
[00:22:28] Jessica St. Clair: A woman undone. There's that serial. There's that side serial killer.
[00:22:32] Paul Scheer: Btk. Yes.
[00:22:33] Jason Mantzoukas: That's the moment where she starts chasing Kayla.
[00:22:36] Jessica St. Clair: And why?
[00:22:36] Jason Mantzoukas: Why? For no reason. And Kayla, and.
[00:22:38] Paul Scheer: To kill her.
[00:22:39] Jason Mantzoukas: Kayla only randomly is following Dustin. She doesn't know he's there. He does. She doesn't know he has the Nutcracker. She's just trying to stay away from Mrs. Joy.
[00:22:48] Paul Scheer: And then, and then Dustin does say, oh. Running away from Mrs. Joiner?
[00:22:53] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:22:53] Paul Scheer: As if she's, this is what we know in the town to be true.
[00:22:56] Jason Mantzoukas: Well, she's probably trying to kiss everybody as well.
[00:22:58] June Diane Raphael: Yeah, probably.
[00:22:59] Jason Mantzoukas: Maybe she was, do we think she was chasing Kayla to French kiss her?
[00:23:02] June Diane Raphael: Kiss her?
[00:23:03] Paul Scheer: Well now that's a whole other story. I mean.
[00:23:05] Jessica St. Clair: But if she was so hot for business. If she was so into making the sale, then wouldn't she have stayed open for Dustin?
[00:23:12] June Diane Raphael: That I didn't understand.
[00:23:14] Jason Mantzoukas: That's where mean stars hollow vibes though. Like the kooky, I feel like they wanted the kooky weirdos of small town holiday nonsense people.
[00:23:22] Paul Scheer: And this movie does do a lot of those scenes that you don't need where like Dustin's outside of her store and he, she's like, oh, you're here early. Why don't you come inside? They don't just start the scene a scene later.
[00:23:31] Jessica St. Clair: They do a lot of walkups, a lot of walkups, a lot of walking down long hallways.
[00:23:35] June Diane Raphael: You don't need.
[00:23:36] Jason Mantzoukas: They just don't have.
[00:23:37] June Diane Raphael: Cut in.
[00:23:37] Jason Mantzoukas: They don't have to.
[00:23:38] Jessica St. Clair: Hallway, hallway.
[00:23:38] Jason Mantzoukas: There's also like also is Dustin's house, his office or his home?
[00:23:42] Paul Scheer: Well, he's definitely not a kitchen.
[00:23:44] Jason Mantzoukas: There's no locking doors. There's no kitchen. It is he people knock and he is like, come in. It's a business, but it's not.
[00:23:51] Paul Scheer: Can I also show you the most upsetting thing about it?
[00:23:53] Jason Mantzoukas: Please.
[00:23:54] Paul Scheer: Image five here. Um, this is what his house is. And I'll just point out that, you know, an elevator plays a very large part of this, uh, movie and this shows us that he is on the ground floor.
[00:24:06] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, yes.
[00:24:06] Jessica St. Clair: No.
[00:24:07] Paul Scheer: He is on the ground.
[00:24:09] Jason Mantzoukas: But also, let's take a look at this. I mean, the weird bunny eared thing that's in the center of the screen here. That's weird.
[00:24:17] Paul Scheer: Looks like he's in Crate Barrel.
[00:24:19] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:24:20] Jessica St. Clair: He rented this loft.
[00:24:21] Paul Scheer: Mm-hmm.
[00:24:22] Jessica St. Clair: That was staged.
[00:24:23] Paul Scheer: Okay.
[00:24:23] Jessica St. Clair: And they just said, sight unseen we'll take it, we'll take it. It's everything in the room.
[00:24:26] Jason Mantzoukas: Leave it. Leave everything.
[00:24:27] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah. Leave it. Leave everything. Someone lives here.
[00:24:28] Paul Scheer: Cause he is cooking. I mean, he is cooking in this kitchen. He just never goes to an industrial kitchen.
[00:24:33] Jessica St. Clair: No.
[00:24:33] Jason Mantzoukas: He, and what's weird is he.
[00:24:34] Jessica St. Clair: You think is against the law.
[00:24:35] Paul Scheer: A hundred percent.
[00:24:36] Jason Mantzoukas: He wears his chef's whites when he's here cooking at home and then he, and then he wears them out in the world.
[00:24:43] Jessica St. Clair: I've never seen a chef walking about.
[00:24:45] Jason Mantzoukas: Well, I don't, don't think they're supposed to because they have to be clean and they're getting dirty. Dirty from the outside world.
[00:24:50] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:24:51] Paul Scheer: But he also is having only a five minute meetup with his friend. Like there's so many meetups in this movie where they just go, Hey, hey, great to see you. All right, I'm gonna leave now. Like they, like they, no time passes.
[00:25:03] Jessica St. Clair: And we don't learn anything.
[00:25:04] Paul Scheer: No.
[00:25:05] June Diane Raphael: Well it's so hard because what I couldn't get, I couldn't get my mind around is how Jana, if Jana's best friends with, um, Kayla. Kayla and they work together at a magazine called a magazine called Trend. Yeah.
[00:25:22] Jason Mantzoukas: A website. Website maybe.
[00:25:22] June Diane Raphael: Yeah. But then also it seems like Jana, who's a solid 10 and I thought she was beautiful, but 10 years older than Kayla.
[00:25:28] Jessica St. Clair: Of course, yes.
[00:25:28] June Diane Raphael: Okay. But it seems that they maybe went to high school together 'cause she references her being a valedictorian.
[00:25:33] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:25:34] June Diane Raphael: Okay. If this is a town, town in.
[00:25:35] Jason Mantzoukas: Which is part of her selling points.
[00:25:36] June Diane Raphael: Of course. If, if a valedictorian came up and started kissing you, would that change your?
[00:25:42] Paul Scheer: Well, Jason's not gonna change his opinion on this.
[00:25:44] Jason Mantzoukas: Here's, here's the thing. I would love it.
[00:25:46] June Diane Raphael: A valedictorian. That's,
[00:25:47] Jason Mantzoukas: I would love it.
[00:25:47] June Diane Raphael: That's first in class, valedictorian.
[00:25:49] Jason Mantzoukas: Valedictorian. I would love a beautiful valedictorian to start kissing me in an elevator the minute she says, by, by the way, BTW.. BTK. I am engaged and that was fun.
[00:26:00] June Diane Raphael: You're upset.
[00:26:01] Jason Mantzoukas: Thanks.
[00:26:01] June Diane Raphael: Okay. Just was asking.
[00:26:02] Jason Mantzoukas: I was just doing that to distract from Mrs. Joiner. Peace. I'm engaged. I would be like, fuck you.
[00:26:08] June Diane Raphael: Okay.
[00:26:08] Jason Mantzoukas: I'm out here giving a plus kisses away to engaged ladies?
[00:26:12] June Diane Raphael: Okay, here's, but back to my question. Jana, when I think went to high school with Kay, although I don't know how the numbers work there. And then.
[00:26:21] Paul Scheer: Jana was a very bad student.
[00:26:23] June Diane Raphael: And then, um, Dustin also grew up in this town with his cousin.
[00:26:29] Jessica St. Clair: But they don't know each other.
[00:26:29] June Diane Raphael: How do they not know each other?
[00:26:30] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:26:31] Jessica St. Clair: That's interesting.
[00:26:31] Jason Mantzoukas: None of them know each other. And, and the and Kayla could not be more famous.
[00:26:36] June Diane Raphael: Janet knows Dustin though.
[00:26:37] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes. Yes. 'cause he's the caterer and they know each other from town and all that.
[00:26:40] June Diane Raphael: And Mrs. Joiner knows all.
[00:26:41] Jason Mantzoukas: Everybody.
[00:26:42] Jessica St. Clair: Yes.
[00:26:42] Jason Mantzoukas: But it felt like the show wanted, or the movie wanted us to be like, oh my God, she's Kayla and nobody seems to really know her except Janet and Mrs. Joiner.
[00:26:50] Paul Scheer: By the way, they should have made.
[00:26:52] Jessica St. Clair: Stop saying, Mrs. Joiner.
[00:26:52] Paul Scheer: They should have made Kayla the star.
[00:26:54] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:26:55] Paul Scheer: And he should have been like the director and she's the star. So, because like, be the,
[00:27:00] June Diane Raphael: That's interesting.
[00:27:00] Paul Scheer: To be the fiance of a famous person is an odd choice.
[00:27:04] Jessica St. Clair: Nobody cares.
[00:27:05] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[00:27:05] Jason Mantzoukas: It's a, did the movie answer where Kayla's family is? This is her hometown.
[00:27:10] Paul Scheer: Well, they were all at this, they were all at the.
[00:27:12] June Diane Raphael: It seems like they're dead.
[00:27:13] Paul Scheer: No, they were all at the, the party though.
[00:27:15] Jessica St. Clair: Makes sense.
[00:27:15] Paul Scheer: Their engagement party, and it wouldn't have been his family at the engagement party.
[00:27:19] Jason Mantzoukas: No, because, well, he did invite a lot of press, he said.
[00:27:21] June Diane Raphael: You know, all that Palo Alto press.
[00:27:23] Jessica St. Clair: All that Palo Alto press.
[00:27:25] June Diane Raphael: To cover entertainment.
[00:27:27] Jason Mantzoukas: The PAP, the paps.
[00:27:29] Jessica St. Clair: They swim in it.
[00:27:29] Jason Mantzoukas: That's the, you know, that's the, the.
[00:27:31] Jessica St. Clair: Did anybody feel this was, this was, and I, I now know it was a KAY Jeweler's ad, but if you told me me, it was.
[00:27:38] Paul Scheer: Oh my gosh. I'm just realizing something. That Kay's jeweler must have also paid for the bracelet.
[00:27:44] Jessica St. Clair: Yes.
[00:27:44] Paul Scheer: Oh, the bracelet. That's the colors of Christmas.
[00:27:46] Jessica St. Clair: Ugliest bracelet I think I've ever seen in my life.
[00:27:48] Jason Mantzoukas: What was?
[00:27:49] Paul Scheer: It missing the color green, by the way.
[00:27:51] June Diane Raphael: It wasn't the colors of Christmas.
[00:27:52] Jessica St. Clair: It wasn't, it was, what was it? It was red and pink. Also. He said also, he said, it's not what you think. I wouldn't be so presumptuous. Aren't they already engaged?
[00:28:04] Paul Scheer: Oh, yeah. Well, I guess.
[00:28:06] June Diane Raphael: Broke it off.
[00:28:07] Paul Scheer: They broke it off, but then she, he's coming back. That's the, the Mia Culpa.
[00:28:10] Jessica St. Clair: Are those matching. Is that a matching earring? That's the grossest thing I've ever seen.
[00:28:14] June Diane Raphael: That's a bracelet.
[00:28:15] Paul Scheer: It does.
[00:28:15] Jessica St. Clair: That bracelet. That bracelet makes me wanna barf.
[00:28:17] Jason Mantzoukas: This looks like a still from a, like a jewelry commercial.
[00:28:21] Paul Scheer: Right.
[00:28:21] Jason Mantzoukas: When it's like he went to the mall and we got a.
[00:28:25] Paul Scheer: But it also is a terrible presentation of it.
[00:28:27] Jessica St. Clair: Terrible box. I would think every case begin, by the way, I have a story I. I auditioned for.
[00:28:35] Jason Mantzoukas: Should we, should we leave?
[00:28:36] Jessica St. Clair: Jewelry commercial. I feel like you and I at this point, were staying in a friend's trundle bed anyway.
[00:28:42] Paul Scheer: Wow. Wait, hold on. What was that part of the.
[00:28:44] Jessica St. Clair: Jason and I, for a couple months slept. I had a, I Did you sleep in the trundle or did I?
[00:28:49] Jason Mantzoukas: I slept on the floor.
[00:28:50] Jessica St. Clair: Okay. It was trundle situation. Anyway, I went to a commercial audition for Kay's jewelry.
[00:28:56] June Diane Raphael: Wow.
[00:28:57] Jessica St. Clair: And they made us kiss, or the, the guy did kiss me and it was so shocking. The audition was like.
[00:29:05] Paul Scheer: Now you were in that situation.
[00:29:06] Jessica St. Clair: And I was like, every kiss begins with, he was like.
[00:29:10] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh my god.
[00:29:11] Jessica St. Clair: Now wouldn't have it wouldn't have happened these days.
[00:29:13] June Diane Raphael: No, it shouldn't have happened then. We did have a union at that point.
[00:29:17] Jessica St. Clair: They were cool with it.
[00:29:18] Paul Scheer: Right.
[00:29:18] Jessica St. Clair: The casting director was like, wonderful chemistry.
[00:29:20] June Diane Raphael: Oh, you're seeing this guy just rolled with it and was like, I'm going in.
[00:29:22] Jessica St. Clair: I think so.
[00:29:23] June Diane Raphael: Bold.
[00:29:23] Jessica St. Clair: But it was encouraged. And I didn't like it.
[00:29:27] Paul Scheer: Oh, you didn't like it?
[00:29:28] Jason Mantzoukas: You didn't like it that someone just shockingly started kissing you in a scenario that you didn't think was gonna be kissing. Was the audition in an elevator?
[00:29:36] Paul Scheer: Has anyone ever done that?
[00:29:37] Jason Mantzoukas: I just wanna know, like was the audition in an elevator.
[00:29:42] Paul Scheer: You got mad at me last night.
[00:29:43] June Diane Raphael: I don't, I actually don't like being pointed at. I don't, don't like it from across the room and I don't like it there.
[00:29:47] Jason Mantzoukas: This what I'm saying. We should not be this close to each other.
[00:29:50] Jessica St. Clair: It's too close. I just keep, I just keep da. Yeah.
[00:29:54] June Diane Raphael: Here's my question. That presentation was so horrible and I would imagine if Kay is putting in, that's what I mean. You think Kay put in a hundred grand? 50 grand? I dunno.
[00:30:04] Paul Scheer: So roughly the budgets of these movies run around, uh, this is what, 2 million? One to 2 million. That's the average budget.
[00:30:10] June Diane Raphael: So you're Kay and you know, you put in a hundred grand, maybe, maybe 200 grand. Why don't you have a representative on set? For the commercial shot.
[00:30:20] Jessica St. Clair: Not Kay bracelet. I don't think that box doesn. But it should have been.
[00:30:23] Paul Scheer: Right.
[00:30:23] Jason Mantzoukas: That's the Branted box as opposed to the.
[00:30:24] Paul Scheer: Right. They wouldn't probably, Kays Jewelers wouldn't want to give, that's the one at the end.
[00:30:28] June Diane Raphael: That's every kiss begins with K.
[00:30:30] Paul Scheer: Yes.
[00:30:30] Jessica St. Clair: If you're gonna say K, it's always, every kiss begins with a, you know, like, that's.
[00:30:35] Paul Scheer: Right, right. Yeah.
[00:30:36] Jessica St. Clair: That's a trigger for me.
[00:30:37] Jason Mantzoukas: What does it say on the on the bottom. What does it say in front of the ring? The, the Leo diamond, it says right. Okay. Is that what it says, Leo? I mean, the chat will tell if you're Molly, what's going on with the chat? Anything?
[00:30:47] Paul Scheer: Check in with Molly. Molly cam. What do we got on the molly cam?
[00:30:50] Molly Reynolds: Hey everybody. Um, sorry to back up a little bit, but a lot of people are pointing out that the beautiful bracelet that's the color of Christmas, is actually the color of the lesbian flag.
[00:31:00] Paul Scheer: All right.
[00:31:00] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, I'm Okay.
[00:31:01] Jessica St. Clair: Great to know.
[00:31:02] June Diane Raphael: Is Carlton a lesbian? Honestly, if Carlton's a lesbian, that makes all the sense in the world.
[00:31:07] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah, I would love that.
[00:31:08] June Diane Raphael: Is his name Carlton?
[00:31:09] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:31:10] June Diane Raphael: Great.
[00:31:10] Jessica St. Clair: I'd love to see Carlton at the end of the movie get into a Subaru with another woman. Oh, you know what I mean?
[00:31:16] Jason Mantzoukas: Well, Carlton is having, he seems to be having an affair now once she starts her affair. He starts to have an affair with the sugar plum fairy.
[00:31:23] Paul Scheer: Now, I didn't like that woman 'cause I felt like she was moving in.
[00:31:27] Jason Mantzoukas: Well, where she was. What? Our girls already cheated on him.
[00:31:30] Paul Scheer: Yeah, but she seemed a little like, whatever.
[00:31:32] June Diane Raphael: They're in separation.
[00:31:32] Jessica St. Clair: They were broken up. They were broken.
[00:31:34] Paul Scheer: Dark hair girls don't trust them.
[00:31:36] Jason Mantzoukas: Wait.
[00:31:38] Jessica St. Clair: Hot take.
[00:31:39] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh my God.
[00:31:39] Jessica St. Clair: Hot take.
[00:31:40] Jason Mantzoukas: These takes are incredible.
[00:31:41] Jessica St. Clair: They're hot.
[00:31:42] Jason Mantzoukas: So you're cool.
[00:31:43] Paul Scheer: Dark hair girls.
[00:31:45] Jason Mantzoukas: Giving you unwarranted kisses in an elevator.
[00:31:47] Paul Scheer: Yeah, they're trustworthy.
[00:31:49] Jason Mantzoukas: Not a brunette.
[00:31:49] Paul Scheer: No brunette.
[00:31:49] June Diane Raphael: That's to dye my hair bond. I don't know, there's any footage of that woman during the dance numbers. Oh, right. Be terrible. I I, no, but some of them were at least actual dancers. I'm not saying they were good, but they were dancers and then there was our brunette.
[00:32:05] Paul Scheer: Yeah, right.
[00:32:06] June Diane Raphael: The dark haired villain who was truly like the most hilarious part is she wasn't, she was looking around sort of doing a lot of this, doing a lot of just like little jumps.
[00:32:14] Little like this. This little jumps. Little jumps. Looking, looking. Then her role in this is to complain about all the dancers.
[00:32:23] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:32:23] Paul Scheer: Right. Yeah.
[00:32:24] June Diane Raphael: And I had an eagle eye on her. She is not a dancer because she had an acting role.
[00:32:28] Paul Scheer: Well, I mean, when you see the sets and the props all in there, then it really, then she really pops. The pair down version.
[00:32:35] Jessica St. Clair: Fun hair. She should be the star. The biggest.
[00:32:37] Paul Scheer: A little old though, right? To I mean, and like.
[00:32:40] June Diane Raphael: Careful.
[00:32:42] Jessica St. Clair: Now you can't for dark haired girls and.
[00:32:45] June Diane Raphael: Jesus.
[00:32:46] Jason Mantzoukas: I agree with Paul. She was grossly old. Yeah.
[00:32:49] June Diane Raphael: First of all.
[00:32:50] Jason Mantzoukas: And I thought, I felt uncomfortable about it because like between her and Doris Roberts, I was like, every woman in this is elderly.
[00:32:56] June Diane Raphael: Wow. Okay. So I actually.
[00:32:57] Paul Scheer: I've never seen the Nutcracker and I just assumed that the sugar plum fairy is a little girl who dances out.
[00:33:02] Jessica St. Clair: Ew. No.
[00:33:03] Paul Scheer: Who's that girl?
[00:33:04] June Diane Raphael: That's, uh, I don't remember her name.
[00:33:05] Jessica St. Clair: That's Clara.
[00:33:06] June Diane Raphael: But Clara, yeah.
[00:33:07] Paul Scheer: Why isn't she ever, why didn't she have rehearsal?
[00:33:09] Jessica St. Clair: She's like the queen of
[00:33:11] Paul Scheer: Oh, okay.
[00:33:11] Jessica St. Clair: You know, the, the other worlds
[00:33:13] Paul Scheer: Angelica, Houston, like that kind of a thing.
[00:33:15] Jessica St. Clair: What? She's not.
[00:33:16] Jason Mantzoukas: I would imagine that's a, that's a dangerous brunette right there.
[00:33:18] Jessica St. Clair: Never seen the Nutcracker Paul. I guess you were busy with those birds.
[00:33:21] June Diane Raphael: This is making me like Carlton a lot more.
[00:33:24] Paul Scheer: Wow.
[00:33:25] June Diane Raphael: 'Cause he. Was just trying to cast the roles the way he saw them, he's not interested in, this is a very paired down version of the Nutcracker.
[00:33:32] Paul Scheer: This is like when I saw Patty LeBonne do Sweeney Todd, and there's only two people.
[00:33:36] Jason Mantzoukas: I just wanna make sure just to, not to swing you back out of Carlton's favor, but he does say at a certain point, I am the draw.
[00:33:44] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[00:33:44] Jason Mantzoukas: Not about the dance, it's not about the dancers, it's about him. This is an egos battle for him.
[00:33:49] Jessica St. Clair: But also Carlton's abusive to the dancers. He throws his script off the, you know, and in this day and age, you know.
[00:33:56] June Diane Raphael: Well, it's not this day and age is it?
[00:33:57] Jason Mantzoukas: It's 2017 in the movie.
[00:33:59] Paul Scheer: 2015.
[00:33:59] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, okay.
[00:34:00] Paul Scheer: Different time. A different time.
[00:34:02] June Diane Raphael: Anyone surprised that I, when, when the movie started and, and we were about 15 minutes in, I thought for sure that Dustin was a pastry chef.
[00:34:09] Jason Mantzoukas: Same after referring to him as the baker.
[00:34:11] June Diane Raphael: The baker.
[00:34:12] Paul Scheer: He only bakes. We only see him baking. And then he is baking more stuff for, and I thought for a long time he was making food for dogs.
[00:34:17] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:34:17] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:34:18] Paul Scheer: Uh, but it was to raise money for the dogs.
[00:34:20] Jessica St. Clair: Me too. I thought they were making dog cookies.
[00:34:22] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:34:25] Paul Scheer: Yes.
[00:34:25] June Diane Raphael: I really wanna go over the number of events.
[00:34:27] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:34:27] June Diane Raphael: That we are working toward in this, this movie that, that are on the docket that are.
[00:34:31] Jason Mantzoukas: And none of which are important whatsoever.
[00:34:33] June Diane Raphael: Okay. So there is the engagement party.
[00:34:35] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:34:35] Jessica St. Clair: Right.
[00:34:35] June Diane Raphael: Which at a certain point there's no engagement. So that sort of turns into just like a party. A party. A party with lot of.
[00:34:41] Jason Mantzoukas: Which is doubling, is doubling as Carlton's like, um, a premier party.
[00:34:47] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:34:47] Jason Mantzoukas: He's invited press, he's invite, he's uh,
[00:34:49] Paul Scheer: So the show is opened?
[00:34:50] Jason Mantzoukas: I think it's about to.
[00:34:51] Paul Scheer: Okay, got it.
[00:34:52] Jason Mantzoukas: Think this, I think this is in service of that.
[00:34:53] Paul Scheer: Got it.
[00:34:53] June Diane Raphael: So there's that. And also I do wanna address the fact that at one point he says, we have to keep our engagement because it will help the opening of the show.
[00:35:03] Jessica St. Clair: Right.
[00:35:03] June Diane Raphael: Couldn't draw that line.
[00:35:04] Jason Mantzoukas: It's even, what's even crazier at a certain point is that she says we're holding off on our wedding until, until after New Year, after Christmas. Because it's the, he has, he's so busy with the show. But that means they haven't, they're gonna only start planning their wedding right after this show. They, so they're like a year away from getting married.
[00:35:25] June Diane Raphael: Time to make out with a lot of other guys and see if we even wanna do that.
[00:35:28] Jason Mantzoukas: See if you can beat this.
[00:35:29] June Diane Raphael: So then there's also a fundraiser for, for the dogs, the animal shelter. But at one point, Paul, you said it's not for the shelters, for the people who work there.
[00:35:39] Paul Scheer: No, I mean, it's for was for the dogs, and I was saying it's for the, it's for the organization, for the dogs.
[00:35:44] June Diane Raphael: It's for the organization. Ultimately it's for the dogs though. I hope that money's not gonna going there.
[00:35:48] Paul Scheer: Well, what about the people?
[00:35:49] June Diane Raphael: Overhead costs.
[00:35:50] Jessica St. Clair: It's a very nice shelter.
[00:35:51] June Diane Raphael: That fundraiser is for the dog shelter, however, they wanna break up.
[00:35:54] Jason Mantzoukas: But to be fair, to June. I agree. I would love to get a look at those books. Yeah, I'd love to get a look at the books for this, for this shelter. Because didn't, I don't trust these guys.
[00:36:02] Paul Scheer: He didn't seem to make that many cookies that would actually bring in, okay.
[00:36:05] Jason Mantzoukas: It seems like a lot of dogs and only Joshua was working there.
[00:36:08] Paul Scheer: They're always barking.
[00:36:09] June Diane Raphael: There's another event, there's some sort of community event that they are going to, that she, she has made flyers for the dog event to give out at some community event. Then, correct me if I'm wrong, chat. I believe there's also something that she calls a tree event.
[00:36:30] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:36:30] June Diane Raphael: Which is sort of the Christmas market she goes to.
[00:36:32] Jason Mantzoukas: I think that might be where the um, where, but it might also be part of the fundraiser for the dogs. There's also in a montage, a carnival.
[00:36:43] June Diane Raphael: Yes, that's right.
[00:36:44] Jason Mantzoukas: They also go, also go to a full carnival.
[00:36:46] Jessica St. Clair: Think that's the pier.
[00:36:47] Paul Scheer: And that's after she just said she had the most, the best time of her life researching the maker of the Nutcracker.
[00:36:54] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:36:54] Paul Scheer: We have that image, Molly?
[00:36:55] June Diane Raphael: I forgot that whole story. The artist, the 80-year-old man who made the nutcracker.
[00:36:58] Paul Scheer: Well, like what Nutcracker comes with like. Like, I don't.
[00:37:02] June Diane Raphael: A booklet, a pamphlet.
[00:37:02] Paul Scheer: Well, I I didn't know that Nutcrackers were so specific, like to the maker.
[00:37:06] June Diane Raphael: No.
[00:37:06] Paul Scheer: It's like, it's like you're getting all
[00:37:07] Jason Mantzoukas: Well, it's as if this man invented the concept of a Nutcracker.
[00:37:10] Paul Scheer: Yes.
[00:37:10] Jessica St. Clair: That I wanna read a book about.
[00:37:11] Jason Mantzoukas: Wouldn't that be great? But no, this is just a store-bought Nutcracker that they're pawning off as some like great artisan. Oh, they also did a thing in this scene where they're texting where each of them says aloud the text that is then shown word for word on screen.
[00:37:27] Paul Scheer: But sometimes it's different 'cause he said, seriously, that's great. And then when she got it just said, seriously, no dot dot dot That's great.
[00:37:34] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, funny.
[00:37:35] Paul Scheer: But now this is what she says. She says, researching Vance has been two of the most fulfilling hours I've had in a long time.
[00:37:42] Jason Mantzoukas: Her life, her life is dog shit. She was a valedictorian of her class and she is now, she's terrible at flirting.
[00:37:49] Paul Scheer: Wiki, Wikipedia ing has been the most fulfilling time.
[00:37:54] Jessica St. Clair: And also he's so down on her. He's like, you write that article yet tonight? Like, he's so everybody.
[00:38:00] Paul Scheer: Right.
[00:38:00] Jessica St. Clair: I like that. Everybody wants for her to get laid. They wanna get her laid. That's everybody's, everybody in the town.
[00:38:07] June Diane Raphael: Yeah.
[00:38:07] Jessica St. Clair: With the exception of Mrs. Joiner who wants to make that sale. Everybody is like, let's get her coupled up. I don't know what Jana's feeling.
[00:38:15] Paul Scheer: Because she's wasting time. She's a bad business manager. She's out making postcards.
[00:38:19] Jason Mantzoukas: She's engaged.
[00:38:21] Jessica St. Clair: No one liked her. The cousin, her body be banging. No one cares about her. Throw.
[00:38:25] Jason Mantzoukas: Joshua does.
[00:38:26] Jessica St. Clair: They throw her this deep side part like, and we never see them. You know what I mean? He might have killed her. We wouldn't know. I thought that was very sinister. He is like, wanna come to pizza? I'm like, that's the last we're gonna see of that cousin.
[00:38:36] June Diane Raphael: Yeah.
[00:38:37] Jason Mantzoukas: Wait, you think Joshua's a BTK style murderer? You think? You think we never see Kim again because she's bound, tortured, and killed.
[00:38:44] June Diane Raphael: I personally really liked the fact that Dustin was on her ass about doing her work.
[00:38:50] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:38:50] Jessica St. Clair: But here's the deal.
[00:38:50] Jason Mantzoukas: I like that.
[00:38:51] June Diane Raphael: I never seen that in a movie.
[00:38:52] Jessica St. Clair: So much on her plate, right now.
[00:38:54] Jason Mantzoukas: It's nothing, she's nothing on her plate.
[00:38:57] June Diane Raphael: She's separated.
[00:38:57] Paul Scheer: Like, she's paraphrasing a note card into an article for Tempo Magazine or whatever it.
[00:39:03] Jessica St. Clair: Here's a hot take. Here's a hot take. You guys are not gonna see coming.
[00:39:07] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh boy. Single on St. Clair.
[00:39:09] Jessica St. Clair: She has agreed to be Carlton's business manager. So honestly, all of the duties that she's pissed about doing, yes, that's her job.
[00:39:17] Paul Scheer: Yes. This is what I've been saying, Jess.
[00:39:19] June Diane Raphael: You're saying, do you think she's getting paid for that? If I don't see a direct deposit.
[00:39:26] Paul Scheer: Wow.
[00:39:26] June Diane Raphael: If I don't see cash in my hands or in the bank, that's not a job.
[00:39:31] Jason Mantzoukas: So you think she's working for free?
[00:39:32] June Diane Raphael: I do. I do. Do not think he's paying her.
[00:39:35] Jessica St. Clair: But then don't agree to it. If you agree, yes, I will do this for you, and then you disappear for three days.
[00:39:40] June Diane Raphael: If I'm not being paid.
[00:39:41] Jessica St. Clair: To get to go to carnivals.
[00:39:43] June Diane Raphael: To be an indentured servant to this man.
[00:39:45] Jason Mantzoukas: He's, he's relying on her to get the show up on its feet and she's, he's gotta focus out there fucking.
[00:39:51] Jessica St. Clair: Getting the double.
[00:39:51] Paul Scheer: And look, look this, look at this. Even though they've broken up, he's got requests. Please pick up my favorite socks. Where are you? How come you're not answering your phone? I have a headache. I need some medicine.
[00:40:01] Jason Mantzoukas: Guys, can I ask you a very, very, very honest question? Yeah. Do you have a favorite pair of socks?
[00:40:07] June Diane Raphael: Yes.
[00:40:08] Jason Mantzoukas: Really?
[00:40:09] Jessica St. Clair: You do?
[00:40:09] June Diane Raphael: Yep.
[00:40:09] Paul Scheer: I wore these today.
[00:40:10] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah. Those are good socks.
[00:40:11] Paul Scheer: Christmas socks.
[00:40:12] June Diane Raphael: I do.
[00:40:12] Jason Mantzoukas: Okay.
[00:40:12] June Diane Raphael: I have a couple now of the same pair.
[00:40:14] Jessica St. Clair: I treat my socks like shit.
[00:40:16] Jason Mantzoukas: I don't think of my socks in any way.
[00:40:18] Paul Scheer: Never. I don't have any.
[00:40:19] Jason Mantzoukas: I don't think of them as, as, in any way.
[00:40:21] June Diane Raphael: And can I say something? And this is very vulnerable right now.
[00:40:23] Jessica St. Clair: Okay.
[00:40:24] June Diane Raphael: Okay. I actually have, Hmm. I've been on. A mission just this year to upgrade my sock situation.
[00:40:36] Jason Mantzoukas: Love this.
[00:40:36] June Diane Raphael: Because I know it's something I've never paid attention to in my whole life.
[00:40:40] Jessica St. Clair: And you'd like to turn your attention to it.
[00:40:42] June Diane Raphael: I, I always like, they were haphazard. And then what I would do, and this is actually very vulnerable, is because I didn't care about them. I never got new ones.
[00:40:51] Paul Scheer: Oh.
[00:40:51] Jason Mantzoukas: I totally understand that.
[00:40:52] June Diane Raphael: And so this year is the first year where I'm like, I deserve, I want
[00:40:57] Jessica St. Clair: You had to go to a single for that?
[00:40:58] June Diane Raphael: I did. Because it's been a very empowering thing for me to, to, to say and to feel that I deserve good socks.
[00:41:05] Jason Mantzoukas: I love this.
[00:41:06] Paul Scheer: Bombas.
[00:41:06] June Diane Raphael: Wonderful Bombas.
[00:41:07] Jason Mantzoukas: Wait a minute, wait a minute.
[00:41:07] Paul Scheer: The Brant to go.
[00:41:09] Jason Mantzoukas: Wait a minute. What is this?
[00:41:10] Jessica St. Clair: This a Kay jewelry situation?
[00:41:12] June Diane Raphael: Something vulnerable.
[00:41:13] Jason Mantzoukas: Are you both saying, Bombas, what is this?
[00:41:14] Jessica St. Clair: Dammit.
[00:41:15] Paul Scheer: And you know what? Every time you buy a pair of socks, they give some money to charity.
[00:41:20] June Diane Raphael: It's not. Okay.
[00:41:22] Paul Scheer: Bombas does.
[00:41:23] Jessica St. Clair: Bombas does.
[00:41:24] June Diane Raphael: Bombas does.
[00:41:25] Paul Scheer: I do have a pair of, I do like a athletic, do like socks. That I like, that I like.
[00:41:28] Jason Mantzoukas: I have, here's the thing, I similarly, a bunch of years ago, just bought all new socks that were good, like good socks. But I don't have a fa, like that's my favorite pair. I just am like, socks foot. Right. Go. Yeah. You know? But I don't have shitty, I agree. I have good socks.
[00:41:42] Jessica St. Clair: I would expect you to have bought all of the same sock.
[00:41:45] Jason Mantzoukas: I did.
[00:41:46] Jessica St. Clair: Put them all in a drawer.
[00:41:47] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:41:47] Jessica St. Clair: You don't have to pair them.
[00:41:48] Jason Mantzoukas: Correct.
[00:41:49] Jessica St. Clair: Those motherfuckers are just.
[00:41:51] Paul Scheer: But you have, so you have a favorite.
[00:41:52] Jessica St. Clair: Socks, socks, socks, socks, socks, socks, socks.
[00:41:54] Paul Scheer: But he has favorite socks. But out of those socks, he's not saying, but this is my favorite.
[00:41:59] Jessica St. Clair: No, you can't, they're all the same.
[00:42:01] June Diane Raphael: I think you don't have a favorite of these.
[00:42:02] Jason Mantzoukas: Correct.
[00:42:03] June Diane Raphael: Well, I think what you guys aren't maybe into is, and I will say Paul got me into this. I would see that he had, he liked a playful sock. Well, that's Paul. I know.
[00:42:12] Paul Scheer: I used to, but then I was, yeah.
[00:42:13] June Diane Raphael: But then I, I sort of got him away from that and said like, well, you're not gonna show our personalities to our socks.
[00:42:19] Paul Scheer: Yeah. She yelled at me about that. She yelled at me about that, and then I stopped a playful sock.
[00:42:23] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, wow.
[00:42:24] Paul Scheer: This is a, this is a very special one. I, this is a holiday.
[00:42:25] June Diane Raphael: I allow it. I'll allow it only for today. But what's interesting is, I don't know if you've noticed this, but I've now, you're taking on a playful sock.
[00:42:34] Jason Mantzoukas: You can get rid of it.
[00:42:34] June Diane Raphael: I started to get it up like that Happy Sock Brant. I'm like, I like those socks.
[00:42:38] Jessica St. Clair: Here's a cautionary tale. Matt Lauer. When I met when I met him, remember we used to go on?
[00:42:43] Paul Scheer: Yes, I did.
[00:42:44] Jessica St. Clair: No, remember, we used to go on?
[00:42:45] Paul Scheer: Yeah, of course I do.
[00:42:46] Jessica St. Clair: He never wears socks.
[00:42:48] June Diane Raphael: Ew.
[00:42:48] Jessica St. Clair: He's a loafer without socks.
[00:42:49] June Diane Raphael: That's disgusting.
[00:42:50] Jessica St. Clair: And that's serial killer shit.
[00:42:51] Paul Scheer: You know what my barber.
[00:42:52] June Diane Raphael: That's disgusting.
[00:42:53] Paul Scheer: My barber Rudy told me. He, I was wearing my.
[00:42:56] Jason Mantzoukas: You can't fail.
[00:42:57] Paul Scheer: I was wearing, I was wearing my socks up. And he is like, that's, that's good. He's like, that is like that. You wear your, you pull your socks up.
[00:43:04] Jessica St. Clair: Oh yeah. If you don't, you gotta be eyes out for those men.
[00:43:06] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[00:43:06] Jessica St. Clair: Who are going socksless into a loafer. Bad. Going down.
[00:43:10] Jason Mantzoukas: Well now such a, it was such a look for a while. Yeah. Right around this time actually. Like the late teens.
[00:43:15] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:43:16] Jason Mantzoukas: The like slightly high.
[00:43:18] Paul Scheer: Mm-hmm.
[00:43:18] Jason Mantzoukas: Uh uh.
[00:43:19] June Diane Raphael: I think that's a great look.
[00:43:20] Jason Mantzoukas: And a bare ankle.
[00:43:21] Paul Scheer: You like that look.
[00:43:22] June Diane Raphael: I do like. Don't point at me. I do like, I do like that look, but, with a no show sock.
[00:43:28] Jason Mantzoukas: Correct.
[00:43:28] June Diane Raphael: Yeah, of course.
[00:43:29] Paul Scheer: I think what we're, I think what we're realizing though is.
[00:43:33] Jessica St. Clair: We're all touching tonight.
[00:43:35] Jason Mantzoukas: Why do a, why do you think we earn when you touch them?
[00:43:38] Paul Scheer: I, I think what we're realizing is socks are your happy and there's a lot of happy in this movie. Can we play the montage of happy?
[00:43:44] June Diane Raphael: No. No.
[00:43:45] Paul Scheer: Yeah. This is something that I thought they were trying to make a thing, but it wasn't. This is, they're happy. The montage.
[00:43:51] June Diane Raphael: Oh, that was really, that turned my stomach.
[00:43:53] Jessica St. Clair: I kept waiting for there to be a threesome with the cousins and her because.
[00:43:58] Movie Audio: Look at these cookies. They look so happy.
[00:44:01] They were made with happy.
[00:44:03] Well, the real happy's coming up.
[00:44:05] So what's the happy?
[00:44:07] Jessica St. Clair: This could be the beginning of a soft core porn.
[00:44:09] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[00:44:09] Jessica St. Clair: Could it not? We're throwing dough at each other. Oh, I gotta take this thing out off.
[00:44:14] Movie Audio: This is the happy I was talking about.
[00:44:17] This is seriously happy.
[00:44:19] Jason Mantzoukas: Here's my movie pitch. My movie pitch is, wouldn't it have been so much better if Kayla and Kim, Kim, what's the cousin's name? If they ended up together because she and he have so little chemistry. Oh wow. That's a, that is a deep side part. Um, I was like, oh, they like, Kim is more interesting to me.
[00:44:38] Jessica St. Clair: Kim is great. Kim is great.
[00:44:40] June Diane Raphael: I, I really, and I know you felt this way too, Paul, so I don't want you to just say. 'cause I know you felt this way too. I thought they had great chemistry. I love them together.
[00:44:50] Paul Scheer: I, well now, if I was to disagree with you, I would've been lying the first two times that you made me agree that you did feel this way.
[00:44:55] Jason Mantzoukas: You made me?
[00:44:56] Jessica St. Clair: Are you emotionally abusive relationship like Carl?
[00:44:58] Paul Scheer: I love, they had a great relationship and they were really good.
[00:45:01] Jason Mantzoukas: Why?
[00:45:01] Paul Scheer: Really good.
[00:45:01] Jason Mantzoukas: Why are you bullying?
[00:45:02] Paul Scheer: In California. Love being out. It's okay, if anyone kisses anyone in an elevator, come on. Fine. Don't point. Don't point any of us.
[00:45:10] Jason Mantzoukas: And if June wants to chase someone down the street and kiss them in a magical elevator, as long as there's mistletoe, I'm okay with it.
[00:45:16] Jessica St. Clair: Guys, did anybody say at any point in this movie that the elevator was magic?
[00:45:21] Paul Scheer: No.
[00:45:22] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes. Doris Roberts. Doris Robert says, you know, they say, not that it's magic, but that they, they, they tell stories about this elevator. I, this elevator has a story to it.
[00:45:32] Jessica St. Clair: I think it was meant to be a magic.
[00:45:35] Jason Mantzoukas: I think it, it's soft magic. Well, I think it's soft. Hard magic. That's what I tell the ladies. You're about to, you're about to see the soft magic. If you're lucky.
[00:45:43] Jessica St. Clair: Close your eyes.
[00:45:43] Jason Mantzoukas: The hard magic ladies.
[00:45:44] Paul Scheer: Merry Kissmas, Happy Blow Year. May you have some hard magic in your future.
[00:45:49] Jason Mantzoukas: Hard magic is, isn't that what they call that stuff you put on ice cream?
[00:45:52] June Diane Raphael: Oh my God.
[00:45:52] Paul Scheer: I'll say that. I wanna, I wanna talk, I wanna talk for a second about the elevator in general. Uh, and I think that maybe the best person to hear from is one of the stars of the film.
[00:46:04] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, no.
[00:46:05] Paul Scheer: Brant Daugherty uh, we were able to, uh, get him on the show. So this is Brant.
[00:46:10] Brant Daugherty: Hey, jerks. Uh, what's up Brant Daugherty here. You probably recognize me better as the star of Merry Kissmas. And Paul wanted me to share some anecdotes asked me what, uh, kissing Doris Roberts was like. Is it weird that there's mistletoe in an elevator?
[00:46:25] All amazing questions. None of which address the point this movie was written by an insane person. And I looked up her resume and it turns out she's written exclusively the holiday films where the leads kiss in an elevator. And I'm like, what the fuck happened to you in an elevator? Anyway, the movie was directed by a man who couldn't give half a shit what happened?
[00:46:52] June Diane Raphael: Oh, wow, he's really free.
[00:46:53] Brant Daugherty: What are we doing here? And he looked up from his phone and went, I don't know. Looked back down.
[00:46:58] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh fuck. Wow.
[00:47:00] Brant Daugherty: Doris Roberts, she leans into me and she goes, Brant, I'm gonna try something. And I was like, say less. You may have my body. And so unscripted, she pulls me and kisses me, slaps me the fucking tongue.
[00:47:18] June Diane Raphael: No.
[00:47:18] Brant Daugherty: And then slaps me and walks away. Anyway, the movie makes no sense on a cellular level from moment to moment. The fact that you've watched it and can highlight that I am supposed to be in an elevator, but I live on the first floor. Like I can't tell you how I love fucking love and respect you guys because this is exactly the kind of critical minds we need watching this film.
[00:47:38] We need people who can understand the madness, and I feel like you see it.
[00:47:43] Jessica St. Clair: I love him.
[00:47:43] Brant Daugherty: I love you guys. That was like the longest cameo of my life because you've hit on a very niche subject for me, so I'm obsessed with him, possibly including Paul. I love you guys. Oh, you have an amazing, amazing Christmas.
[00:47:57] Please look up the writer of this movie and, and, and, and let me know has she branched out at all from people making out in elevators? 'Cause I hope not.
[00:48:05] Paul Scheer: Well Brant.
[00:48:05] Jason Mantzoukas: I love it.
[00:48:05] Paul Scheer: Thank you Brant. And, and, and so now I'm gonna say.
[00:48:08] Jessica St. Clair: Okay, you've only gotten better looking. What did I say? He's only gotten better looking.
[00:48:11] June Diane Raphael: He's a star. We broke Oscar Isaacs on this podcast, and I he's a, he a same way.
[00:48:15] Jessica St. Clair: I'm gonna devote the rest of my career to making that guy a star. Okay. And casting him opposite June and I.
[00:48:22] Jason Mantzoukas: So now I do understand why she kissed him?
[00:48:23] Jessica St. Clair: Would be called lives to be lived in which we just make out with him for like four or five hours.
[00:48:28] Paul Scheer: Let me just say that Brant was also in 50 Shades Free.
[00:48:32] Jessica St. Clair: Ooh.
[00:48:32] Paul Scheer: As Sawyer. He is the bodyguard that Christian hires for Dakota Johnson.
[00:48:35] Jason Mantzoukas: Okay.
[00:48:35] Paul Scheer: I do wanna bring up one thing that Brant said, which was that Doris Roberts improvised the kiss.
[00:48:43] Jason Mantzoukas: I think tongue. No, I think she improvised in one take the tongue and the slap.
[00:48:46] Paul Scheer: Oh, okay. Got it. Okay.
[00:48:47] June Diane Raphael: Like the k jewelers guy, you know. Similarly.
[00:48:49] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:48:50] June Diane Raphael: Yeah.
[00:48:50] Paul Scheer: Okay. Got it. Because I was gonna say that's a major. I agree. I agree.
[00:48:53] Jason Mantzoukas: I thought that at first too, but when said the, the slap.
[00:48:55] Jessica St. Clair: Roberts for sure needed to just update her SAG insurance. I have been in some interesting movies with, with older, more well-established actors who clearly don't need the money, who just say, you know what, let me just do my hours.
[00:49:08] Paul Scheer: Mm. Right.
[00:49:09] Jessica St. Clair: Come in, come out, and then we're done.
[00:49:11] Paul Scheer: Okay, got it. All right. She's, she's clocking hours.
[00:49:14] Jessica St. Clair: Hundred percent.
[00:49:15] Paul Scheer: Wow. Wow.
[00:49:16] Jason Mantzoukas: What if I told you though, she was getting paid in gift certificates to Kay jewelers?
[00:49:22] June Diane Raphael: Oh my God, you guys.
[00:49:24] Paul Scheer: Oh my God, I.
[00:49:25] June Diane Raphael: Oh my God.
[00:49:25] Jason Mantzoukas: This was, that was, these two things both rocked me.
[00:49:28] Paul Scheer: I know. I'm really like.
[00:49:29] June Diane Raphael: I just wanna show you didn't wanna do, I had a note that just says I like him.
[00:49:32] Jason Mantzoukas: Elevator writer movies.
[00:49:34] Paul Scheer: Well, by the way, I will say this, that Brant also, uh, wrote the first parody christmas movie for the Hallmark Channel.
[00:49:40] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, cool.
[00:49:41] June Diane Raphael: Yeah, that's fine.
[00:49:41] Paul Scheer: In 2019 called the Christmas, Christmas movie.
[00:49:43] June Diane Raphael: Because I also, I feel like we haven't spent enough time on Kayla. I really liked Kayla's.
[00:49:47] Paul Scheer: Yeah. Yeah. We have nowhere to go.
[00:49:48] June Diane Raphael: The only complaints I had about her is she didn't turn off her phone notifications.
[00:49:52] Paul Scheer: Oh, well this is an issue that.
[00:49:54] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:49:54] June Diane Raphael: I do have this issue. I think that if you don't know to turn your notifications off when you're with a group of people, but she's his business manager, I don't care.
[00:50:04] Jason Mantzoukas: Are working emails that she should be handling.
[00:50:06] June Diane Raphael: I don't care. You can still get those notifications and have your phone on silent.
[00:50:11] Jason Mantzoukas: But this is 2015 when people, they didn't know how to.
[00:50:13] Paul Scheer: Option, they didn't have that option there.
[00:50:15] June Diane Raphael: I found that to be insane, to go on a romantic date with poten a prospect, a post-engagement prospect.
[00:50:22] Paul Scheer: You call dates prospects?
[00:50:24] Jason Mantzoukas: A post-engagement prospect.
[00:50:26] Jessica St. Clair: Prospect, yeah. She prospect looking for.
[00:50:28] June Diane Raphael: Leave your notifications on. It's crazy.
[00:50:31] Jessica St. Clair: So Brant is so sweet. He's always like, you should take that. That's your, and that's why. That's your ex.
[00:50:35] June Diane Raphael: And I love that. We're just calling him Brant now.
[00:50:37] Paul Scheer: I love Brant.
[00:50:38] Jessica St. Clair: I love Brant.
[00:50:39] Jason Mantzoukas: When she describes to him that her relationship is over and she says, I'll describe it in. Twitter signs, 140 characters, characters are less. And I was like, what, what, what, what is this?
[00:50:49] June Diane Raphael: But seriously, why does she go back to Carlton?
[00:50:53] Jason Mantzoukas: For no people, people make decisions in this movie for no reason other than plot.
[00:50:58] Jessica St. Clair: It. This is why he says, and this is why I think probably their parents are dead at a very young age or something, and she's looking for love. And, but he says, he says that, that you're more important to me than work. And that's what she's been waiting to hear is that she's important, right?
[00:51:14] Paul Scheer: 'cause he, she's like kind of threatening him, like, I'll break up with you. And then he was, then he said, but I love you. And then she was like, now you're confusing me.
[00:51:20] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah, yeah. Like, yeah. But, but the final thing that makes her come back is she said, he says, you're more, he said, you should get back to the ballet. And he says, you're more important to me than work. That's how bad her self-worth is.
[00:51:31] June Diane Raphael: If I were her, I would look at Brant and say, okay, he also really cares about his work. He wants to open up a restaurant.
[00:51:38] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:51:39] June Diane Raphael: But.
[00:51:39] Paul Scheer: I don't think he's gonna be open up a restaurant anytime soon. Really jumping in from like baking cake.
[00:51:44] Jason Mantzoukas: We saw, we saw him make zero food beyond cookies that looked not good.
[00:51:48] Paul Scheer: He bought a Nutcracker.
[00:51:50] Jessica St. Clair: He did look like what I would make.
[00:51:51] Paul Scheer: Most of his cooking was buying a Nutcracker.
[00:51:54] Jason Mantzoukas: Okay. And when they're doing, when they're, so he's, so when they go in the day and they're gonna do the, um, he's wearing the suit and this is where he realizes that they are um, he, he is standing in front of a table that you would think would have examples of all the food he is gonna serve. But it's a roll of bubble wrap. A big brown just box full of stuff. Like, it looks like just random supplies.
[00:52:18] June Diane Raphael: Like, haven't you seen Top Chef? They spend a lot of time just like writing notes.
[00:52:22] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[00:52:22] June Diane Raphael: Wait, try kind of ideating, thinking about things. Checking out different dogs. They have to kind of get out in the world.
[00:52:29] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:52:29] June Diane Raphael: Before they want create something. They have to, but here's the thing, if I'm her and I am nervous that, that, um, this guy, my fiance won't commit, he's not gonna nail down a date.
[00:52:39] He's obsessed with his work. And then I see Brantt and we have that amazing kiss and he's also, he's a guy who wants something outta life. He's a go-getter.
[00:52:48] Jessica St. Clair: Yes.
[00:52:48] June Diane Raphael: He wants to, he's an entrepreneur. Great. Loves dogs. Then I see that he's willing to adopt a dog.
[00:52:54] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh yeah.
[00:52:54] June Diane Raphael: Marry that. That man.
[00:52:56] Jason Mantzoukas: But she still goes back to Carlton.
[00:52:59] Jessica St. Clair: Isn't good. That's why.
[00:53:00] Jason Mantzoukas: Why though? We don't ever understand why she, she's making such terrible decisions. Because I wanna, Jana, seems to wanna shake her and and say like, cut it out.
[00:53:09] June Diane Raphael: Question for Jana.
[00:53:10] Jessica St. Clair: Jana needs to get a fucking life.
[00:53:11] Jason Mantzoukas: Well, yeah, because what Kayla is like, how come you're not dating him?
[00:53:14] Jessica St. Clair: Exactly, I think Jana I think Jana is honestly as a single white female thing to Kayla. 'Cause why is she so obsessed with Kayla's life? Focus on yourself, Jana. Get out there.
[00:53:24] Paul Scheer: Well, she wants get, I just wanna bring up one thing because as I'm hearing all this conversation, we're watching Kayla do the same mistake twice. She's with a man who's obsessed with his work and then this guy also obsessed with his work. He wants to open up a restaurant. That's no easy task.
[00:53:40] June Diane Raphael: No.
[00:53:41] Jason Mantzoukas: Well that's why he says to her, her when she makes those, I'm going to be honest, terrible postcards for him.
[00:53:47] Paul Scheer: Yeah, they are bad.
[00:53:47] Jason Mantzoukas: He says,
[00:53:48] June Diane Raphael: Making postcards isn't her dream, she's not a graphic.
[00:53:50] Paul Scheer: Well designing a website is apparently her job.
[00:53:52] Jason Mantzoukas: Neither is getting the other guy's fav, favorite socks. Yeah. So she's doing the exact same nonsense.
[00:53:57] Paul Scheer: Googling.
[00:53:58] Jason Mantzoukas: So he's like, Hey, don't do this for me. Do something for you. You know, do something for you. And, and that's when she is like, and her, the second wish of the movie is, I wish I knew how to set boundaries. And I'm like, shit. Okay.
[00:54:12] Jessica St. Clair: Is that what this whole movie has been about?
[00:54:14] Jason Mantzoukas: What the fuck is this movie now?
[00:54:15] June Diane Raphael: I know. I just understood the movie.
[00:54:18] Paul Scheer: Alright.
[00:54:18] Jessica St. Clair: What?
[00:54:19] June Diane Raphael: This is a movie about a woman with writer's block.
[00:54:23] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, okay.
[00:54:24] June Diane Raphael: She's doing everything she can. She's being a business manager.
[00:54:28] Paul Scheer: Okay.
[00:54:28] June Diane Raphael: Unpaid business manager slash intern.
[00:54:30] Paul Scheer: We don't know about the unpaid thing. Let's not make comments like that.
[00:54:32] June Diane Raphael: He's not paying her. No, there's no way She's doing every, even when she's in the right relationship because he's forcing her to write. She gets out of it.
[00:54:43] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[00:54:44] June Diane Raphael: She just doesn't wanna see that little cursor blinking back out.
[00:54:48] Jessica St. Clair: I get that.
[00:54:48] June Diane Raphael: I do understand that. I do understand. See that blank page.
[00:54:51] Jason Mantzoukas: At the end of this movie, she should have written the thing. I think.
[00:54:55] June Diane Raphael: I think she's about to.
[00:54:56] Jessica St. Clair: She is about to.
[00:54:57] Paul Scheer: It's a year later.
[00:54:58] Jason Mantzoukas: Too late, Kayla.
[00:55:00] Paul Scheer: It's a year later. He has moved to la He has not opened a restaurant. They're on a Ferris wheel.
[00:55:05] June Diane Raphael: You in LA?
[00:55:06] Paul Scheer: They're on the Santa Monica Pier here later too.
[00:55:08] Jessica St. Clair: I don't know if that was meant to be.
[00:55:09] Paul Scheer: Okay.
[00:55:09] Jason Mantzoukas: Or is it a Palo Alto Pier? I, that's what I thought.
[00:55:12] Jessica St. Clair: Palo Alto isn't on the coast.
[00:55:13] Jason Mantzoukas: I couldn't, I had, I looked it up. There is coastline in Palo Alto because I was like, because in the middle of that montage, what's weird is they're, they're looking out, they're under a bridge. Oh yes. They're multiple times at the carnival doing stuff that is pier-based. But they start.
[00:55:26] June Diane Raphael: Pier-based.
[00:55:27] Jason Mantzoukas: They start their date montage and they're wear he's wearing the buffalo sweater.
[00:55:31] Paul Scheer: Yes.
[00:55:31] Jason Mantzoukas: The bison uh, sweater. The big shaggy white sweater.
[00:55:34] June Diane Raphael: I love. He looks great in that sweater.
[00:55:35] Jason Mantzoukas: Great sweater. He ends the montage in that sweater.
[00:55:38] June Diane Raphael: That's correct.
[00:55:39] Jason Mantzoukas: In the midst of the montage, they each are wearing 10 other outfits.
[00:55:43] Jessica St. Clair: Yes. That's why, I mean, like, they covered a lot of ground.
[00:55:45] Jason Mantzoukas: So the montage suggests that days have passed.
[00:55:48] Jessica St. Clair: Yes. Yeah.
[00:55:49] Jason Mantzoukas: But they end exactly where they started. Same, in the same, out same day.
[00:55:53] Jessica St. Clair: Because I think in a weird way. They probably shot, you know? Oh. So they were like, we don't have time for this change.
[00:56:00] Jason Mantzoukas: Yep.
[00:56:00] Jessica St. Clair: Nobody, if, if Brant is telling us that the director went, I don't know, and back to his phone, nobody's tracking outfits. I feel like Brant probably, and the, the lovely actors who played Kayla, they were, had to direct themselves.
[00:56:14] Paul Scheer: By the way, here we go. One year later, same outfit.
[00:56:16] Jason Mantzoukas: Here's what I wanna say, and this is important for me. There is entirely too much face grabbing during all kissing in this movie. Every kiss is full of, it must be direction because Carlton does it.
[00:56:32] June Diane Raphael: I don't think anyone was directing them.
[00:56:33] Jason Mantzoukas: Everybody is doing so much face like big face grabbing, touching, chin grabbing.
[00:56:42] Jessica St. Clair: If, if someone ever touches my chin like this, I'm gonna break their fucking dick off.
[00:56:47] Jason Mantzoukas: I swear. If I ever went to grab a girl by the chin like this, like you little cute. I would expect to be stabbed, even if, and I would understand it.
[00:56:55] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah. You would go this and I get, and I would slowly put it slowly put a, a knife for you.
[00:57:00] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah. Like a slow while making full eye contact. Yes, exactly.
[00:57:03] Jessica St. Clair: He's dead.
[00:57:03] Jason Mantzoukas: Just a tiny stiletto blade that you've got. Um, it's real. There's so much big grabbing of faces that I was like, don't, don't get gr grabby with the head.
[00:57:14] Paul Scheer: But I feel like you need, I think that that's a movie thing. Like you need to like. Be pulling someone because it, it's weird to be like, yeah.
[00:57:21] June Diane Raphael: If you don't grab when you're doing an onscreen kiss, I think it feels like it's just too much space to cover.
[00:57:29] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[00:57:29] Jessica St. Clair: I'd love to know how many real life face grabs are going on. You know. I think very few.
[00:57:35] Jason Mantzoukas: So, so few.
[00:57:36] Jessica St. Clair: You think?
[00:57:37] Jason Mantzoukas: So. I don't, I can't, don't, I can't picture.
[00:57:39] I don't. You need to because you know what's happening.
[00:57:42] You don't need a guideline to be like, okay, let me, or.
[00:57:44] Paul Scheer: Two face, yeah.
[00:57:45] June Diane Raphael: Yeah. It's like a, you know, an airplane.
[00:57:47] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes. It's like I wanna, I gotta put my hand on your head so that I know where to put my. So then my lips have a direction to move because it's wherever my hand is.
[00:57:58] Jessica St. Clair: And I, but I feel like when someone's got you by here, it's so quick that you could go snap.
[00:58:03] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh yeah.
[00:58:03] June Diane Raphael: I don't like two hands.
[00:58:06] Jason Mantzoukas: There's two hands. They, they're doing two hand kisses. They're making sure she doesn't get away. Roberts' head grabbing, he's head grabbing Carlton's head, grabbing it's head grab city in this.
[00:58:19] June Diane Raphael: That's crazy.
[00:58:19] Paul Scheer: Well, I mean, you have to because you're not sure, like a lot of these kisses are, are stolen valor kisses. I mean, they're not.
[00:58:24] Jessica St. Clair: They're not. There's no consent. This is not a movie about consent.
[00:58:27] Paul Scheer: You're trying to keep people together.
[00:58:28] Jason Mantzoukas: So few people in this movie are receiving kisses that they wanted. There's a lot of kissing in this movie, but many of the kisses are unprompted and surprising to one of the two parties.
[00:58:41] Jessica St. Clair: I think that's part of her kink, honestly.
[00:58:43] June Diane Raphael: Kayla?
[00:58:44] Jessica St. Clair: No, the.
[00:58:44] Jason Mantzoukas: Doris Roberts.
[00:58:45] Jessica St. Clair: The writer.
[00:58:46] Paul Scheer: Oh, the writer. Yes, I agree.
[00:58:48] Jason Mantzoukas: Think about Dustin. Our boy Dustin in one day is, oh no, two days back to back days. First he gets on an elevator and Doris Roberts molests him. Yeah. Second day Kayla molests him.
[00:58:57] Jessica St. Clair: But Kayla.
[00:58:57] Jason Mantzoukas: And he says, why didn't I take the stairs?
[00:59:00] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah. Well he is on the first floor.
[00:59:01] Jason Mantzoukas: Well, again, he lives on the first floor.
[00:59:03] June Diane Raphael: I'll say, and why did I take the elevator?
[00:59:06] Paul Scheer: Yeah, I'll say that.
[00:59:07] Jason Mantzoukas: Why didn't I just jump on my window?
[00:59:09] Paul Scheer: Some of the face touching, I think is, is maybe tied to the
[00:59:12] June Diane Raphael: Oh God
[00:59:12] Paul Scheer: Thematic song. I'll read you some lyrics here. It says Chasing and Clouds as they go by trying to find the reason why you elevate my love. I can't wait to get across the Frisco Bay. By your touch captivated your too much. Opening.
[00:59:26] June Diane Raphael: What is this?
[00:59:26] Jessica St. Clair: Opening lyrics. These are lyrics of the, which I believe someone's family member must have written.
[00:59:31] Paul Scheer: It was.
[00:59:31] Jessica St. Clair: Played that.
[00:59:32] Paul Scheer: It was, it was the, uh, the person who com the that scored the film. Yeah, it was. Yeah. Was, yeah. It's Elevate My Love by Branton Jarret, the composer of the film. Yeah. Elevate My Love.
[00:59:40] Jason Mantzoukas: When they do their montage of falling in love, right?
[00:59:43] Paul Scheer: Mm-hmm.
[00:59:44] Jason Mantzoukas: Do you think they fuck?
[00:59:46] June Diane Raphael: I should hope so.
[00:59:48] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah, of course. A couple times.
[00:59:48] Paul Scheer: No, they're never fucking.
[00:59:49] Jason Mantzoukas: You don't think they fucked?
[00:59:50] Paul Scheer: No, she's not. She's a good girl.
[00:59:51] Jessica St. Clair: I think she's staying over well, first of all, where's she's sleeping on the street.
[00:59:54] Paul Scheer: She going, well, she's going sleeping on that sofa that hotel room.
[00:59:56] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes. That was weird. That was weird. It also felt like, 'cause it's the, that cut is weird because she starts typing. And then it's her waking up and he's typing on the same computer.
[01:00:08] Paul Scheer: I thought he was stealing her idea.
[01:00:09] June Diane Raphael: I thought too thought.
[01:00:10] Jason Mantzoukas: I was like, wait a minute. Has she never, has she never been typing? Like is
[01:00:15] Paul Scheer: Oh wow.
[01:00:16] Jason Mantzoukas: Is this his story? Is he, is this his story?
[01:00:19] Paul Scheer: It's like a John Candy delirious movie where his.
[01:00:20] June Diane Raphael: I thought for sure he was stealing the idea and he was going to run off with this really Nutcracker.
[01:00:27] Jason Mantzoukas: He's a brunette.
[01:00:28] June Diane Raphael: Nutcracker and it was going to be his next big hit.
[01:00:32] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, cool.
[01:00:32] June Diane Raphael: Although that's a great idea for a sequel.
[01:00:34] Paul Scheer: By the way, I'll say this. I think the reason why she had to stay in the hotel room is because it was full of cos players. 'cause there's a convention in town. If you look at scene one.
[01:00:42] Jason Mantzoukas: Really?
[01:00:43] Paul Scheer: Uh, scene one, when they first check into the hotel, this is just a image one.
[01:00:46] Jason Mantzoukas: Well that's what the things that's true throughout the movie is they own nothing. They have not gotten clearance for any, they are shooting in the real world.
[01:00:54] Jessica St. Clair: Oh my god.
[01:00:54] Paul Scheer: Yeah. In a movie with no extras.
[01:00:56] Jessica St. Clair: That's interesting.
[01:00:57] Paul Scheer: Cos players are out.
[01:00:57] Jessica St. Clair: That's interesting.
[01:00:58] Jason Mantzoukas: It feels like oftentimes they are just existing in the world like the. They're, they have not.
[01:01:04] Jessica St. Clair: Found footage.
[01:01:04] Jason Mantzoukas: Like I believe the, the tchotchke store is, I don't think they set decorated that at all.
[01:01:09] Jessica St. Clair: No.
[01:01:09] Jason Mantzoukas: I think they found a, a store.
[01:01:10] June Diane Raphael: No, no.
[01:01:10] Jason Mantzoukas: Full of non. Put it Nutcracker in.
[01:01:12] June Diane Raphael: And wrote it in.
[01:01:13] Jessica St. Clair: I also think possibly the guy who plays, the guy who plays the doorman has so much free time.
[01:01:17] Jason Mantzoukas: Holy cow. The bellhop.
[01:01:19] Paul Scheer: And he has also no magic. Like combine all these no magic.
[01:01:22] Jessica St. Clair: That someone's dad?
[01:01:23] Jason Mantzoukas: He's dressed like a 1930s bellhop.
[01:01:26] Jessica St. Clair: Yes.
[01:01:26] Jason Mantzoukas: For no reason whatsoever.
[01:01:27] Paul Scheer: And he's working the side door.
[01:01:28] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[01:01:29] Paul Scheer: He's not working a front door.
[01:01:30] Jason Mantzoukas: And he's the only guy.
[01:01:31] Paul Scheer: Nighttime. Daytime.
[01:01:33] June Diane Raphael: There's also these lingering closeups of him, like after they say that we're not getting married till January, they cut to him and he's like, huh.
[01:01:40] Jason Mantzoukas: Hair. Hair pouring out of his, his his weird hat.
[01:01:44] June Diane Raphael: Like what's happening with him? Is he.
[01:01:47] Jason Mantzoukas: I couldn't, I couldn't make heads or tails outta that guy.
[01:01:49] June Diane Raphael: What's going on?
[01:01:49] Paul Scheer: I thought maybe he would be the Santa Claus. Like, wouldn't it be fun?
[01:01:52] Jason Mantzoukas: We kept going back to that Santa when she says, because this is, we talked about it a little bit, but the movie keeps giving us setups for magic, but then nothing.
[01:02:01] Jessica St. Clair: The wishes.
[01:02:01] Jason Mantzoukas: The wishes. She does three wishes with that Santa. None of which come when she says, I want that girl to have all of her dreams come true. I was like, okay, we're gonna see that girl's dreams come true Girl.
[01:02:12] Jessica St. Clair: Right.
[01:02:12] Jason Mantzoukas: Doesn't happen when she.
[01:02:13] June Diane Raphael: Does it though? 'Cause there was a moment where I thought that that girl on the bench was the dark-haired girl that Sugar Plum Fairy.
[01:02:21] Paul Scheer: Oh, the sugar was The sugar. And Jackie Houston.
[01:02:23] June Diane Raphael: Plum Fairy.
[01:02:23] Paul Scheer: So she got like popped into the movie.
[01:02:25] Jason Mantzoukas: So that if that's the case, then, then yes. I hope that's, then.
[01:02:28] Jessica St. Clair: It's not.
[01:02:29] Jason Mantzoukas: I want it to be.
[01:02:30] Jessica St. Clair: I know.
[01:02:30] Jason Mantzoukas: But that would good.
[01:02:31] Jessica St. Clair: We want is not always what happens, what's real.
[01:02:34] Paul Scheer: Well, and I will say that the last Santa time, he's like, well, you'll figure it out.
[01:02:38] Jessica St. Clair: I wrote F you Santa.
[01:02:40] June Diane Raphael: Absolutely.
[01:02:40] Jessica St. Clair: If you are gonna come in and interrupt me, looking over a bridge and then you have no advice but to say.
[01:02:45] June Diane Raphael: You'll figure it out.
[01:02:46] Jason Mantzoukas: Wait. How about the fact that she has twice wished with Santa and then this third time she wishes in a fountain with Santa there next to her?
[01:02:56] June Diane Raphael: You know what I thought I said to Paul.
[01:02:57] Jason Mantzoukas: It's too much. Too many wishing.
[01:02:59] June Diane Raphael: Too many wishes. I said to Paul, oh my gosh. She threw the bracelet away.
[01:03:03] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh.
[01:03:04] Jessica St. Clair: Oh, that had been great.
[01:03:05] Jason Mantzoukas: Would've been great.
[01:03:05] June Diane Raphael: I thought she had. But no, she didn't.
[01:03:08] Paul Scheer: I feel like there's a checklist for like all these like movies and this writer just took all of them instead of just like, yeah, like you take four and then right around the four.
[01:03:17] But she's like, I'll do the wishes. I'll do the Santa, I'll do the, I'll do the cooking.
[01:03:20] Jason Mantzoukas: But all of them only halfway.
[01:03:23] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[01:03:23] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[01:03:23] Jason Mantzoukas: All of them, only halfway. None of the, none of these component pieces are enough, like the wishes needed to actually come true.
[01:03:31] Paul Scheer: I agree.
[01:03:32] Jason Mantzoukas: Or the, the cooking needed to be seen and tasted and eaten and all of it.
[01:03:35] Jessica St. Clair: Well, it makes me realize that all of the Hallmark movies we've seen with Melissa Joan Hart.
[01:03:40] Paul Scheer: Yeah. She's got to done that.
[01:03:41] Jessica St. Clair: Are really well done.
[01:03:43] Jason Mantzoukas: We've seen the best of her.
[01:03:44] Paul Scheer: Molly, I want to go to the crowd. I want to see what people are saying in the chat. Any comments that are happening? Anything that we could add to, I forgot that this was, we've been going so hard.
[01:03:52] Jason Mantzoukas: Have we misunderstood anything? Are they correcting us?
[01:03:54] Molly Reynolds: Ab Absolutely. Well, and I wanted to point out, and people are obsessed with this, uh, bellhop, um, would it surprise you to learn that he is the line producer of this movie?
[01:04:04] Jason Mantzoukas: Not at all.
[01:04:06] Paul Scheer: Not at all.
[01:04:07] Molly Reynolds: Yeah. His name is.
[01:04:08] Jessica St. Clair: Was not an actor.
[01:04:09] Molly Reynolds: Yeah. No. The other thing that we've been learning in the chat about the writer of this film who writes a lot of elevator Christmas.
[01:04:15] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[01:04:15] Molly Reynolds: Movies. Um, she also, uh, created a romance streaming service called Passion Flicks with Elon Musk's sister.
[01:04:24] Paul Scheer: Whoa.
[01:04:25] Jessica St. Clair: What?
[01:04:25] Molly Reynolds: And apparently we need to go down the rabbit hole of Passion Flix, because I think this is some gold.
[01:04:29] Paul Scheer: Wow.
[01:04:30] Molly Reynolds: Yeah.
[01:04:30] Paul Scheer: Passion Flix.
[01:04:31] Molly Reynolds: Passion Flix.
[01:04:32] Jason Mantzoukas: Wow. I don't need to be supporting the Musks though.
[01:04:34] Paul Scheer: No, I mean, you. Well, you know. We don't know what her politics are. We don't, you know, like she Yeah, you're right. You could.
[01:04:42] June Diane Raphael: Wow.
[01:04:43] Jason Mantzoukas: Interesting.
[01:04:43] Paul Scheer: Anything else that we missed before we get into the second opinion?
[01:04:46] Molly Reynolds: Um, everybody's talking about how beautiful Molly is.
[01:04:49] Paul Scheer: Oh, okay. Yeah. Take that. Yeah, it's nice.
[01:04:50] Molly Reynolds: Yeah. Oh, thank you. That, sorry, I was, I supposed to pay attention to other comments?
[01:04:54] Jessica St. Clair: That's it.
[01:04:55] Paul Scheer: Alright, well look, this has been great and you know, obviously we have an opinion about this movie.
[01:04:59] Jessica St. Clair: Great.
[01:04:59] Paul Scheer: There are people out there that have a different opinion. So, uh, I checked in with the Wolves of Glendale, uh, hilarious band.
[01:05:06] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh great.
[01:05:06] Paul Scheer: Uh, they're recording an album right now and they put together a song for us.
[01:05:10] Jason Mantzoukas: Cool.
[01:05:11] Music: [Second Opinion Song]
[01:05:12] Paul Scheer: Yay.
[01:05:13] Jessica St. Clair: That's hot.
[01:05:14] Paul Scheer: They're great.
[01:05:15] June Diane Raphael: Amazing.
[01:05:15] Paul Scheer: Love the Wolves of Glendale. Uh, they'll be at Sketch Fest in San Francisco, uh, later in the month at the Great American Music Hall. They also have been doing this like, uh, iron, uh, chef music show where they just released a, they get like a assigned a topic and they have to write a song about it.
[01:05:31] Jessica St. Clair: Oh, that's cool.
[01:05:31] Paul Scheer: They did one for the Clippers. They did one for, uh, Shrek. It's been.
[01:05:36] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, that's right up your alley.
[01:05:37] Jessica St. Clair: What the Shrek?
[01:05:39] Paul Scheer: Alright, so Merry Kissmas. Uh, there's only one review on Amazon.
[01:05:42] Jessica St. Clair: Oh.
[01:05:43] Paul Scheer: One review on Amazon and it's a five star one. That's it. So we had to go to Letterbox as well. So I'm gonna go back and forth between Letterbox and Amazon and we'll start off with, uh, Splash Point.
[01:05:54] It says,
[01:05:54] "What a surprise to see three of Hallmark's star studs in this film."
[01:05:59] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, wow.
[01:05:59] Paul Scheer: "Though not the channel's hard hitters, these always bring a smile to my face. First, the very cute Ben Levine, he always brightens the screen. His star shines mid movie as the story shift."
[01:06:11] June Diane Raphael: Who's Ben Levine?
[01:06:12] Paul Scheer: Side part.
[01:06:13] June Diane Raphael: Okay.
[01:06:14] Paul Scheer: "Then there's the handsome David Odonnell. Who commands a wonderful presence in his scenes when sporting a beard."
[01:06:20] Jason Mantzoukas: That's Carlton.
[01:06:21] Paul Scheer: That's, yeah. Okay. Okay.
[01:06:22] Jason Mantzoukas: That's Carlton.
[01:06:23] Paul Scheer: Yeah. Yeah.
[01:06:24] "When sporting a beard, I often do not recognize him at first, but looking more closely."
[01:06:28] Jessica St. Clair: I think this might have been his agent.
[01:06:30] Paul Scheer: "Give him away. And then there's"
[01:06:32] Jason Mantzoukas: Hey Molly, super quick Q Where's he from?
[01:06:34] Molly Reynolds: He's from Wellesley, Massachusetts.
[01:06:35] Jason Mantzoukas: Super cool. That sounds about right.
[01:06:39] Molly Reynolds: Mm-hmm.
[01:06:39] Paul Scheer: "Um, and then there's a love interest Brant Daugherty who offers the warmth that that Christmas rom com needs. He's like the whipped cream, a top a cup of hot cocoa, but I still have questions. Is it Santa The Bellhop or Mrs. Billings, who plays any magical role in the blooming relationship? 10 out of 10 stars."
[01:07:00] So it ends with the question.
[01:07:01] Jessica St. Clair: But her question about the magic did not hold her up.
[01:07:04] Paul Scheer: No. Yeah, not at all. Yeah. Um, INTA Zomi wrote
[01:07:07] "Technically a bad movie by all measures, but it grows on you with re watches. Don't just immediately turn it off. Uh, when it comes on tv, give it some time, give it a shot. Certain audio parts, even the fiance's dramatic accent, or the store ladies over the top antics grew on me. It went from a six, technically to a nine star because they are, there are some grading parts, but I really like certain scenes, so I, I don't want it to be lost in all my nine stars. To avoid spoilers, I'll just say the bulk of the scenes worth watching and letting grow on you are at the beginning and at the end. Now, with all that being said, this really doesn't deserve a 10 star. Nevertheless, it's worthy of a rewatch or two when you catch it on TV or when you're in the mood for phrases and moments that get caught in your head and resurface from time to time."
[01:07:55] June Diane Raphael: Okay?
[01:07:56] Jason Mantzoukas: Wow.
[01:07:56] Paul Scheer: "10 outta 10."
[01:07:57] When you're in the mood for phrases and moments that got caught in your head?
[01:08:00] June Diane Raphael: There was a phrase, the cousin who just loved Kim. Yeah. She did say when she was really upset, that Brant did not go after Kayla. She kept on saying she's miffed at him. Yeah, yeah. Doesn't like, I'm really miff right now and I don't get miffed all the time, but I am miffed right now, and I was like, wow, I haven't heard miffed in ever.
[01:08:20] Jessica St. Clair: Well, really, it's been a while.
[01:08:21] June Diane Raphael: People don't know why they don't use it anymore.
[01:08:23] Jason Mantzoukas: It's the hot chocolate of words.
[01:08:25] June Diane Raphael: Yes.
[01:08:25] Jason Mantzoukas: They, it has now been normalized. You can say pissed on tv.
[01:08:29] Jessica St. Clair: Yes.
[01:08:29] Jason Mantzoukas: But you can't say it on Hallmark.
[01:08:31] June Diane Raphael: Right.
[01:08:31] Jessica St. Clair: Miffed.
[01:08:32] Paul Scheer: Um, I will say this, Jason, I'm pulling this one out for you because this is, um, I, I think it's Sir 341.
[01:08:39] The subject line is "Love in an Elevator."
[01:08:41] Jason Mantzoukas: Okay. Just living it up, while we're going that down.
[01:08:43] Paul Scheer: It says, "Christmas is filled with magic. And in this movie, the magic comes in the shape of an elevator. Rumor has it that when people meet in the lift, they will fall in love. Soppy, soppy, gush, gush. Well. It's Christmas."
[01:08:57] June Diane Raphael: Jason, did you write that?
[01:08:59] Jessica St. Clair: Was that you?
[01:09:00] Jason Mantzoukas: Did I write this in an active blackout?
[01:09:02] Paul Scheer: Soppy gush.
[01:09:03] Jason Mantzoukas: Was, was this written last night?
[01:09:05] Jessica St. Clair: Oh my, I wonder wonder if there is elevator kinks. Like if that's a real.
[01:09:10] June Diane Raphael: We, we saw.
[01:09:11] Jessica St. Clair: Well, I'm just saying I think that is a thing.
[01:09:14] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, it's gotta be. Molly, can you look it up will you look up elevator kinks? No. No. It's demonstrated for sure. But I mean, like, it is very, now we know. The, the, the, the, the people that are, that love this kink are putting it into our Christmas movies.
[01:09:27] June Diane Raphael: Yeah.
[01:09:27] Jason Mantzoukas: And are we comfortable with this sexy elevator play.
[01:09:30] Jessica St. Clair: Damn right.
[01:09:31] June Diane Raphael: It's such a good question.
[01:09:31] Jason Mantzoukas: I would love it to be consensual is all I'm saying.
[01:09:34] June Diane Raphael: I understand.
[01:09:34] Jason Mantzoukas: I would love for elevator play to be consensual. That's all I'm asking.
[01:09:38] June Diane Raphael: Maybe that's a part of what the play is.
[01:09:39] Paul Scheer: Well, I guess now I.
[01:09:41] Jason Mantzoukas: In the UK they call, call it lift play.
[01:09:43] Jessica St. Clair: Think it. 'Cause I think a lot of it too, like the jostling puts you on each other.
[01:09:47] June Diane Raphael: Yeah.
[01:09:47] Paul Scheer: Oh, okay.
[01:09:48] Jessica St. Clair: You know, and the light's going out.
[01:09:50] Paul Scheer: We want that and that's what we want. But neither of those things happen here.
[01:09:52] Jason Mantzoukas: Well in the clips too, because we don't have it in this movie. In this movie. He gets stuck in the elevator alone. Then he has his.
[01:09:59] June Diane Raphael: He has an intercom system though.
[01:10:02] Jason Mantzoukas: Correct. And it's.
[01:10:02] June Diane Raphael: You know how all elevators have an intercom system? Drop into the lobby.
[01:10:05] Jason Mantzoukas: You know how you just talk to the elevator when you, uh, when you stuck in it, when you, you just talk to it.
[01:10:10] June Diane Raphael: He was talking to the mistletoe.
[01:10:12] Jessica St. Clair: No, no one was talking to the elevator. He says, he's talking to the elevator. He, he says, elevator, you screwed me.
[01:10:18] Jason Mantzoukas: You, you stopped me from meeting the girl of my dreams. He's mad at the elevator.
[01:10:22] June Diane Raphael: You're right.
[01:10:23] Jessica St. Clair: The, which would lead me to believe.
[01:10:25] Jason Mantzoukas: I love it if it was.
[01:10:25] Jessica St. Clair: Is the magic of the movie.
[01:10:26] Jason Mantzoukas: Yes.
[01:10:27] Jessica St. Clair: That the elevator has orchestrated. He's stuck there in that.
[01:10:31] Jason Mantzoukas: I would love it if everybody knew that. If everybody knew that, is this real or is this the elevator's magic?
[01:10:37] Paul Scheer: Doris Roberts is like moving out and she's like, you know, I'll tell you this elevator's magic. Everybody comes.
[01:10:42] Jason Mantzoukas: You know what would've been awesome? Or you know what would've been awesome? Every time he meets Doris Roberts out of the elevator, she's rude to him and acts like she doesn't, she doesn't even know that it happened.
[01:10:51] Jessica St. Clair: That the, it's basically a horny elevator.
[01:10:54] Jason Mantzoukas: Once you set foot in the elevator, all inhibitions are gone and you just experience love, love.
[01:10:59] Paul Scheer: That makes sense.
[01:10:59] Jason Mantzoukas: And then in the outside world, you have to come to grips with who you are as a human being and find your way to the love that the elevator knows you already have.
[01:11:09] Jessica St. Clair: And the name of that movie is The Elevator.
[01:11:12] Paul Scheer: Sop Sop Gush gush.
[01:11:14] Jessica St. Clair: Soft Magic in the elevator.
[01:11:16] Jason Mantzoukas: Sop gush, gush.
[01:11:16] Paul Scheer: Get ready for some hard magic.
[01:11:18] Jessica St. Clair: Yes.
[01:11:19] Paul Scheer: Um, would you recommend this movie, Jason?
[01:11:22] Jason Mantzoukas: I don't know. Here's the thing. Sort of, I mean, sort of yes, absolutely for the thing, but if you're gonna be watching, a lot of us are putting on holiday movies in this season. I'm gonna say absolutely, put this in the mix.
[01:11:34] Paul Scheer: It's longer than it should be.
[01:11:36] Jason Mantzoukas: It's, this is a great point. And I made this note. So do we, we all talk so often about how you clicked pause and how, is there still 40 minutes left?
[01:11:43] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[01:11:43] Jason Mantzoukas: How is there? Okay.
[01:11:44] June Diane Raphael: I did keep checking.
[01:11:45] Jason Mantzoukas: For the first time ever. The first time I paused to say. How long is this movie? How much more do I have? I was sub 10 minutes. I was eight.
[01:11:56] Paul Scheer: Wow.
[01:11:56] Jason Mantzoukas: Eight and a half minutes into the movie, before I was like, I, I think this has been an internable amount of time. Am I almost done? And I was like, oh, I've watched none of it so far.
[01:12:06] June Diane Raphael: Wow. That's really was really heartbreaking.
[01:12:07] Jason Mantzoukas: To the bone.
[01:12:08] Paul Scheer: I thought the movie was over and I saw 45 minutes left and I was like, wait, wait.
[01:12:13] June Diane Raphael: That's because she breaks up with Carlton and gets out of this sadist relationship she's in.
[01:12:18] Jessica St. Clair: Very early on.
[01:12:19] June Diane Raphael: Very early on, like 20 minutes in. That's why it's so good. The pace of it is so confusing.
[01:12:24] Jason Mantzoukas: Yep.
[01:12:24] Jessica St. Clair: And I would also say in these Hallmark movies that are so successful, there's a an hour and a half buildup to just a kiss.
[01:12:32] Paul Scheer: Yeah. Right.
[01:12:32] Jessica St. Clair: Five minute, eight minute mark of the movie. There's not a lot to live up to.
[01:12:39] June Diane Raphael: I know.
[01:12:39] Jessica St. Clair: Do you know what I'm saying?
[01:12:40] Jason Mantzoukas: I, I don't know what I'm rooting for. You know what I mean? Like they seem to be obviously well matched, so just be together. There isn't anything incredibly difficult. There's no hurdles. No, really there is no.
[01:12:52] Paul Scheer: They only put their, they put their hurdles up in front of each other. They hate each other.
[01:12:55] Jason Mantzoukas: All they need to do is choose each other and that's it.
[01:12:56] June Diane Raphael: Well, if you remember some of the, the very powerful, um, moments of dialogue in the movie, when she says to him, did I cross a boundary?
[01:13:04] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[01:13:04] June Diane Raphael: And he goes, no, you didn't make one. Again, like that hurdles. Those are the types of hurdles that.
[01:13:11] Jason Mantzoukas: If those are the hurdles, they're like, and think about it in this movie, those are the hurdles. Very real life. In the past, the hurdles have been like, this is a nutcracker that has been brought to life. This, this was a dog that has become a man.
[01:13:26] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[01:13:27] June Diane Raphael: And now he's like, he's ally saying.
[01:13:29] Jason Mantzoukas: Those are the hurdles that most people are dealing with.
[01:13:31] June Diane Raphael: No, the this movie are like, you have intentions to be a writer and do all of this, but your counter intentions are stronger.
[01:13:37] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah.
[01:13:38] June Diane Raphael: And are overpowering what you really want.
[01:13:40] Paul Scheer: And we never heard how TheNutcracker was.
[01:13:42] Jason Mantzoukas: Couldn't believe we never saw the performance. We never saw any of that. Nothing.
[01:13:47] Jessica St. Clair: Well, because.
[01:13:48] June Diane Raphael: I don't think it happened.
[01:13:48] Jessica St. Clair: Believe it ends the night before. She says, I'm flying out the night before. She goes, I'm not gonna see the show. It's too painful. And then she says to the Uber driver, gimme 10 minutes, and then she goes into the elevator. So that's the night before. We're led to believe.
[01:14:04] June Diane Raphael: The show went on.
[01:14:05] Jessica St. Clair: I think so. Of course.
[01:14:06] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, I think Carlton, he lives for the theater, he knows.
[01:14:10] Paul Scheer: His name is above the title. It's gonna be the.
[01:14:13] Jason Mantzoukas: He's the Draw. Yeah, he's, he is the draw.
[01:14:15] Paul Scheer: He's a choreographer, director, actor. He's one of the best. Um, we always make shirts here at the show and, and I think that, you know, Bitch that's not Christmas. Definitely the one that we have.
[01:14:26] Jason Mantzoukas: A hundred percent.
[01:14:27] Paul Scheer: Like that's the way to go. But, uh, I do wanna just pull out that we did remake the very first shirts we ever made here on the show.
[01:14:33] June Diane Raphael: Oh, that's beautiful looking.
[01:14:33] Paul Scheer: This is a Ridiculous Cage. Uh, which, uh, the original people at Ear Wolf thought we were gonna get sued by Nicholas Cage and they told us we had a cease desist, which I don't think was real.
[01:14:43] Jessica St. Clair: Um, well that's a, so that's a nice stalking stuff right there.
[01:14:46] Jason Mantzoukas: This was also very much during his very litigious period.
[01:14:50] Paul Scheer: Okay.
[01:14:50] Jason Mantzoukas: So I think we did the right thing.
[01:14:51] Paul Scheer: Now this is one that we also got in trouble.
[01:14:54] Jessica St. Clair: Oh, oh, cute.
[01:14:54] Paul Scheer: This is a legitimate in trouble 'cause it's a BB-8 and it says what is its mission? That's a June shirt. But there was wrong punctuation in it. And uh oh. And people got angry 'cause there was a, oh, there was "it's".
[01:15:05] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, because there was no apostrophe there.
[01:15:06] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[01:15:06] Jessica St. Clair: I think that makes it cool.
[01:15:08] Paul Scheer: That's what I thought too. Yeah. And I was like, isn't that cool? It's like a little collectors and they're like, yeah. And then somebody said, I will not wear a shirt with bad grammar on it.
[01:15:15] Jason Mantzoukas: I would love, I would love it if we had a button to unsubscribe people.
[01:15:20] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[01:15:20] Jason Mantzoukas: Seriously. If we could.
[01:15:22] Paul Scheer: You can't listen anymore.
[01:15:24] Jason Mantzoukas: Great news, you. Thank you so much. Boop. You are unsubscribed.
[01:15:26] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[01:15:26] Paul Scheer: So our Christmas gift to you is that you can go get these original shirts that have never been available since, uh, they were taken down and threatened legal action. Uh, you can get them now, uh, at our TeePublic store.
[01:15:36] Uh, but let's go through what we, with some plugs. Well, my book is always a great Christmas gift. There it is. You could get that.
[01:15:42] Jason Mantzoukas: Stocking stuff.
[01:15:42] June Diane Raphael: It's right into a stocking.
[01:15:43] Paul Scheer: I'll personalize it, which I have to remind myself to go sign those books tomorrow. Uh, I'll do that. And then.
[01:15:48] Jason Mantzoukas: And it feel, it does feel like even just in recent episodes.
[01:15:52] Paul Scheer: Yeah.
[01:15:52] Jason Mantzoukas: You've told so many new stories.
[01:15:54] Paul Scheer: Not even in that book.
[01:15:56] Jason Mantzoukas: We need a book sequel.
[01:15:57] Paul Scheer: Uh, and of course, Dark Web every Monday, uh, in, uh, on YouTube. You can watch it for free if you're catching up. Uh, Rob and I, our studio burnt down. We're in the woods now. We're in a hotel, uh, surrounded by strangers. Uh, and, uh, we have weird guests popping in. Gerald Connell came by, uh, John Gabrus coming by. And then this Monday, Yaster Lesters is, is in bed with us. Uh, but who else is all right, let's see. We'll see by the, the image. Who's gonna put, uh, promote next?
[01:16:20] Jason Mantzoukas: Nice.
[01:16:21] June Diane Raphael: Okay, so that date already passed, but you can actually purchase a ticket at TheDeepDiveAcademy.com and rewatch this show that already happened to tomorrow at 5:00 PM.
[01:16:32] Jessica St. Clair: Yeah.
[01:16:32] Jason Mantzoukas: So similar to how people can watch this show tomorrow.
[01:16:35] June Diane Raphael: Yes. But Jessica.
[01:16:36] Jessica St. Clair: But we're gonna be in chat.
[01:16:37] June Diane Raphael: We'll be in the chat. So we will be watching along.
[01:16:40] Jason Mantzoukas: Cool.
[01:16:40] June Diane Raphael: With our audience tomorrow at 5:00 PM. Pacific Standard.
[01:16:44] Jessica St. Clair: And if you can't make that, you can watch it whenever.
[01:16:46] June Diane Raphael: Watch anytime you want. Yes. But it'll be really fun in the chat. You guys are in the chat. You get it.
[01:16:49] Jessica St. Clair: It's hot.
[01:16:50] Paul Scheer: Jason, we'll go to you.
[01:16:51] Jason Mantzoukas: Man on the Inside Season two, the Fantastic Mike Schur Show. I'm in season two. Yes. Oh, I'm in season two. The show is absolutely hilarious and, and absolutely heartbreaking. Uh, at.
[01:17:01] Jessica St. Clair: I love that show.
[01:17:02] Jason Mantzoukas: Interns and it's wonderful. Percy Jackson and the Olympians season two.
[01:17:06] Paul Scheer: People are loving it. People are the reviews today. They have an amazing billboard. Did you see the Wave?
[01:17:11] Jason Mantzoukas: No.
[01:17:12] Paul Scheer: So they built a, a billboard that is actually splashing waves onto.
[01:17:16] Jason Mantzoukas: Oh, oh, great. It looks gorgeous. And then, um, all out Simon Riches play that I'll be doing on Broadway at the Nederlander Theater, in the new year, get your tickets. Uh, I'm sure you can figure it out.
[01:17:27] Paul Scheer: You're hanging out next to Ben schwartz and, uh, Craig Robinson there.
[01:17:30] Jason Mantzoukas: Uh, Heidi Gardner, Sarah Silverman are in my cast. Craig Robinson. It's gonna be a blast. That's um, and I'll just throw out Taskmaster season 19 just 'cause it's still up there.
[01:17:39] June Diane Raphael: Of course.
[01:17:39] Jason Mantzoukas: Why not?
[01:17:40] Jessica St. Clair: And the Art of Small Talk, guys, this is the time for holiday parties and learning how to small talk is so vital. We have an entire chapter dedicated just to that, just to the holidays.
[01:17:52] June Diane Raphael: That's great.
[01:17:52] Jessica St. Clair: Just to the holidays, how not to get stopped, you know, always have a destination.
[01:17:56] Paul Scheer: I love this book, and the audio book is fantastic. Pop that audio book on during the holidays.
[01:18:00] Jessica St. Clair: Thank you.
[01:18:01] Paul Scheer: I wanna, uh, shout out our amazing team, our producing team, Molly and Scott, the videos that they cut, the cameos that they reached out to. Uh, we wanna thank everybody at Veeps, but more importantly, we wanna thank our in-house staff right here, uh, Wes and Zoe, uh, helping us through our first ever in-person virtual streaming event.
[01:18:21] Uh, and thank you for all submitting your questions, being in the chat, for buying a ticket, watching this. Uh, thank you so much. We appreciate you so, so much. This is the best. Uh, and.
[01:18:30] June Diane Raphael: Merry Kissmas.
[01:18:30] Paul Scheer: Merry Kissmas.
[01:18:32] Everyone: Merry Kissmas.